The Marvalous Misadventures of Tai and friends!
by Tatyana Witwicky
Summary: This be a series of one shots staring Tatyana Topaz Witwicky and the Autobots! What sort of shenanigans could they possibly get into? Read and find out!
1. Chapter 1

Hello everyone!

I am very glad to know that you are enjoying my story 'Meet the cousin.'

I started that like two years ago and I've worked very hard on my writing skills and character development.

So with the convincing of many people and with the help of my good friends Inspire165, Someoneoverhyper, and Fantasyaddict101...I have decided to write a whole bunch of one shots featuring Tai and everyone.

This first one was Inspire165's idea!

As usual, I own nothing but Tai and Psyche.

So here we go!

Onward!  


* * *

**Chapter 1**

**

* * *

  
**

It had started out as a perfectly innocent question.

'What is it with humans in scaring themselves?'

Tai, who had been lounging on the hood of Blurr's new charger mode, opened her blue eyes and glanced over at the black GMC Topkick to her right through her heart shaped sunglasses.

'What you talking about, Hidey?' She asked.

With Sam busy with Bumblebee and Mikaela busy with her 'man child father', she had decided to spend the day at the new Autobot base. It had quickly become her second home; she loved coming here and spending time with her big robot friends.  
Her dog, Psyche, spent her doggy time with her new buddy Ratchet...she loved that big psychotic doc bot like he was her owner. She had offered to get Ratchet a puppy of his own but Optimus quickly stated that he didn't think that would be the best of ideas.

She guessed it was mainly because of Ironhide.

And the twins.

Jesus those twins!

'Do not call me that horrid nickname!' The weapons specialist snapped. 'But seriously, why do you humans watch or go to things that clearly frighten you?'

Tai thought about that. She guessed he was talking about the time when Glen had brought over the Japanese version of The Grudge for them to watch at the Lennox household. It didn't bother Tai in the slightest but Glen, Sam...pretty much everyone in the room had freaked out and hid their eyes behind couch cushions for the entire thing.  
Even Lennox but he denied it by saying that he was smelling Sarah's new fabric freshener.

Apparently, Ironhide had been watching from the window and couldn't quite understand what was going on.

'Well...you see, it's...weird...' She started, struggling to find a good explanation. 'I guess...no matter how freaky it is...people liked to be scared...'

With a gruff noise, Ironhide transformed into his enormous robot form. Tai leapt off Blurr as he too transformed and sat back on the ground, lifting Tai up onto his knee where she sat, swinging her skinny legs.

'Why do you want to be scared?' Ironhide asked again, himself sitting down which caused what felt like a small earthquake.

'You know, I've been asking that question in my head for years...and the answer is always the same damn thing...' She took a deep anticipating breath which caused both mechs to lean closer. 'No idea!' She shrugged with a laugh. 'But my guess is...to put it simply, because it's fun!'

'Why would you find that 'fun'?'

'Wellhumansenjoythethrillandchill...' Blurr chimed in, shrugging his huge shoulder panels. 'I'vebeenaroundthemlongenoughtoknowwhat'sgoingonintheirheads...' While he said that, he gently gave Tai a noogie with his pointer finger.

'Oh you shut up!' Tai laughed. 'You scream like a girl whenever you see a Scottish terrier!'

Blurr winced, his huge head rolling slightly at the mention of that accursed animal.

'But honestly, people like horror movies because they can hardly...and I stress the word 'hardly'...ever happen.' Tai continued to explain to Ironhide as she saw the others step out into the sunlight. 'That's why humans like to be scared because what are the odds that you'll run into a killer with a hockey mask whose been killed like a gazillion times and keeps coming back?'

Ironhide contemplated on that. 'I'll still never understand humans...' He shook his large head.  


* * *

_Meanwhile with Sam and Bumblebee._

'Bee cut it out!' Sam shrieked slightly.

Ever since the whole Grudge incident, Bumblebee kept playing the creepy, croaking noise from the movie.

The Camaro whirred in amusement. '_Buck buck bacawwwww!'_

Sam glared at friend. He liked scary movies as much as the next guy, but ones that messed with his head...he wasn't to big a fan of those. Damn Tai and Glen for making him watch that movie.

'I am no chicken!' Sam protested indignantly.

'Yes you are!' Bee countered cheekily.

'Am not!'

'Too!'

'Not!'

'Too!'

'Not not not!'

'Too too too!'

Before the argument could go any further, Sam's phone went off.

'Don't think I've given up!' Sam stuck his tongue out at his Autobot guardian.

'Hey skank!' He answered, noticing it was Tai.

'_I just came with a monumentis idea!_' Her voice rang with excitement. Sam's eyes widened. _That is either really good or really bad..._

'Do I wanna know?' He asked, giving Bumblebee the 'one minute' sign and went upstairs to his room, once again nearly tripping over Mojo and Frankie.

'_Yes..this ones a good one this time!'_ She exclaimed. The sound of Blurr laughing was heard in the background. _'Oh be quiet!'_

'Last time you said you had a 'monumentis idea', I had to explain to my mom why one of my eyebrows was missing!'

'_Oh when are you gonna let that go!? I didn't know that thing was electric!'_ She whined.

'Okay fine, what's your idea?' Sam gave in, he always seemed too.

'_Well Ironhide asked me an interesting question...'What is it that humans seem to enjoy being frightened?' Or something close to that but anyway...it's very hard to explain so I thought in my head bone, why not just show them?'_

Sam raised an eyebrow with a growing smirk. 'Are you suggesting what I think you are suggesting or am I just talking to myself again?'

'_No..no, we are on the same thinking path...we show the beauty of that which is Horror movies to our Autobot amigos!_' She exclaimed excitedly.

'Wait, which one...not the psychological ones right?'

'_God no...I just want to educate them, not leave them emotionally scarred!'_

'Oh okay, which movie?'

'_The classic Freddy vs. Jason...that way we don't have to show them two eighties horror movies icons back to back!'_

'Yeah totally! Sounds like fun!'

'_Can Mikky come?_'

'No, unfortunately she is still hanging with her old man!'

'_Hey we can make that work...it'll be fun with just the you and the me and the bots and the Psyche!'_

Before either of them could say another word, the line was tapped and the sound from Friday the 13th played over the lines.

'Bumblebee! Cut it out!' Sam laughed.

'_That bot cracks me up...'_ Tai gasped between hard laughs. _'Everytime...okay, the DVD's in my room on top of my TV...No snooping...Adios!!'_

She hung up before he could reply.

'This should be entertaining...' He muttered, heading into his cousins room. 'Remind myself to ask Bumblebee if he's too young for movies like these...'

* * *

'Horror movie night?' Optimus asked after Tai had finished explaining.

'Yeah!' She said excitedly from on top of Blurr's head where she was currently sitting. 'It's when a bunch of people gather around with tons of sugary substances and get the living bejesus scared out of them! It's tons of fun!'

'That does not sound like any sort of fun I have ever heard of.' Ratchet protested, his optics scanning over the internet, looking up said Horror movie night.

'Well it is...so there...' She gave him a sour look.

'Well every horror movie I've seen, I've liked...' Jazz shrugged. 'Especially ones with body parts flying!'

'Hell to the yeah!' Tai exclaimed with a huge grin. 'Who doesn't like seeing someone's head being cut off with spurting blood?!'

Optimus raised an optic ridge at the very disturbing mental images going through his processor.

'Come on, OP! Please!?' She gave him her best puppy dog face, even deciding to make her bottom lip tremble.

'Come on Prime...' Jazz said, picking her up with both of his servos and holding her up. 'Look at that face...' He leaned in close so his much larger one was next to hers and he made the same face as well...as much as he could anyway.

Now Optimus thought that was completely unfair...for some reason, Tatyana's 'puppy face' seemed to work on him. Human had some very convincing facial expressions which himself and Ratchet found incredibly fascinating.

'Oh...alright...' He sighed, ignoring Ironhide's sniggering behind him. 'You may have this 'Horror movie night' activity here...it should be...entertaining.'

Tai and Jazz both gave out gleeful whoops of joy, carefully high fiving each other so her hand wouldn't shatter or be torn off.

'Sweet!' Tai cheered. 'Blurr, we have a few stops to make in preparation-ness of this amazing event!' Blurr folded down into his Charger mode.

'Psyche, you wanna go for a ride?' She called to her massive dog, who had galloped over to her and wagged her giant tail.

Blurr popped open the back door to his car mode for the Great dane, who clambered in and made herself comfortable.

'Be back in a while...see ya!' Blurr, who often drove himself, decided to let Tai take control this time.

Throwing her guardian in reverse, she tore out of the base before turning sharply and speeding down the dirt path, leaving the other bots in a cloud of white smoke.

'She really..'coughs'...need to stop doing that!' Ratchet complained, getting sick of repairing Blurr's tires.

Optimus agreed.

* * *

_At the local market._

'Let's see...popcorn, m&m's, skittles, hotdogs, buns...' Tai kept listing off things she threw into her shopping cart.

'Mustyoubuysomanythings...?' Blurr asked through the Bluetooth that was attached to her ear.

'Yes!' She exclaimed, startling the bakery clerk slightly. 'Movie nights need a lot of food...despite that only Sam and I will be eating them..'

'Moutain dew, mountain dew...oh and mountain dew!' She placed three large liters of soda in as well.

'SometimesIwonderhowyourteethhaven'tfallenoutyet.' Blurr muttered.

'I am going to pretend I didn't hear that...Cheap Styrofoam cooler, ice...crazy straws!'

After dishing out some money for the various sugar induced snacks and beverages, she pushed the cart outside, taking a ride on it over to her waiting guardian and her dog.

'Wheeee!' She laughed, skidding to a halt.

'Ihateitwhenyoudothat!' Blurr scolded her. 'Ialwaysthinkyou'regoingtohitmeorgethit...'

'Hasn't happened yet...consider yourself lucky!' She popped open his trunk, which always made her giggle for some reason.

'To the base!'  


* * *

Sam and Bumblebee pulled into the base after making a quick stop to the video store. Since it was a weekend and his parents were perfectly okay with the Autobots, he picked up a couple more movies for them to watch, knowing it was going to be a late night.

He also knew Tai wouldn't mind, considering the fact that he picked out one of her favorites.

'Hey everybody!' He called, climbing out of Bumblebee, clutching the three films so they wouldn't fall onto the hard concrete floor. Tai had also requested for him to bring their bean bag chairs for them to sit on, and for some reason...Mojo.

'Mojo, quit barking!' Sam scolded his tiny dog as he placed him down as the small Chihuahua yipped excitedly.

'Hey Sam!' Both Sunstreaker and Sideswipe greeted from the giant television screen, where they appeared to be watching some sort of racing show.

'You guys having fun?' He asked, as Bumblebee popped open the trunk. The two bean bag chairs flew out and landed right near the big bot couch, Sam's was just a plain red one while Tai's was a multicolored leopard print one.

'Thanks Bee!' He grinned as he the camaro honked in comply before transforming.

'This shit is the bomb!' Sunstreaker cheered, as a car on the screen smashed into another and flipped about fifteen times.

'Main reason people go to those things is to watch destruction and mayhem.' Sam explained as Bumblebee placed him on his shoulder while carrying Mojo in his hand.

'We heard about the horror movie do-dad that Tai organized!' Sideswipe chimed in after turning off the TV, much to Sunny's annoyance during mid horrifically awesome fireball inducing crash.

'Yeah!' He held up the three small cases to Optimus, who carefully examined them.

Freddy vs. Jason.

Darkness falls.

And The Nightmare before Christmas.

'Picked these three because they are awesome...the third one is a bit cheerier to take your guys processors off the blood and gore and carnage and stuff.'

Truth be told, Optimus could tell the first two movies would be very violent and unpleasant...he had a bad feeling in his processor but he didn't want to disappoint the two humans...or any of his team.

'This will be a...' He paused, trying to think of the right word. 'Educating experience.'

Sam grinned.

'Blurr and his pet at three' o'clock!' Sunny announced. Jazz glared at him.

'Her name is Tai!' He snapped, heading over with him to open the door.

'Yeah, yeah...' The yellow lambo sneered as Blurr tore through, his radio blaring.

* * *

_Freddy vs. Jason_

'Oh man..I love this movie!' Tai exclaimed, settling down on her bean bag chair with Psyche next to her, munching on some popcorn. Everyone had gathered around the large TV and made themselves comfortable; Optimus, Ironhide, and Ratchet sat on the couch while Jazz, the twins, Bumblebee, and Blurr sat on the floor with the two humans.

Sam was eating some skittles with Mojo in his lap. 'You guys will love this...hopefully..'

Tai switched the screen with the human sized remote Ratchet had designed and the madness and fun began.

Watching the movie was pretty eventful. The Autobots were actually a very good audience.

'Boobies!' Tai said loudly, pointing to the topless girl that stood more than twenty feet tall due to the huge screen.

'Oh! Blood spurting from neck!' Sam exclaimed, doing a very over dramatic impression of choking on his own blood.

'This is horrid...' Ratchet muttered to Optimus, as they all watched teenager after teenager being mercilessly slaughtered by the man in the hockey mask.

'Should I be concerned that Tai and Sam are laughing?' Optimus muttered back. Now on the screen was a young man being sliced clean in half before the large killer collapsed on the ground.

'Tha' was brutal...' Jazz muttered, Bumblebee nodding in agreement. 'Yet so cool!'

Bumblebee clicked bemusedly in response.

Ironhide, however, wasn't feeling very good. The sight of the body parts and blood was making him feel sick to his tanks. He fought the urge to close his optics when the one with the knifed fingers dug them into hockey masked killers eyes.

'Man, that's a lot of Blood!' Tai exclaimed excitedly as the hockey masked killer bled profusely.

'_Freddy! Go to hell!'_ The actress on the screen screamed.

The room was suddenly alight with orange light as a huge fireball played on the screen, sending both killers flying into the water.

'Is it over?' Sunny squeaked in a very un-Sunny like voice. Everyone turned and was shocked to see the egotistical yellow twin trying...and failing...to hide his massive head behind Tai and her beanbag chair.

'What are you doing?' She asked in confusion, trying in vain not to laugh.

Sideswipe closed his eyes and shook his head. 'Sparkling.' He muttered.

'Dude, its jus' a movie...they 'ad these on Cybertron...' Jazz laughed. 'They didn' bug you back than...'

'That is because body parts weren't flying all over the damn place!' Sunny yelled, grimacing as the images of all the blood, torn flesh, and people being stabbed.

'And we're not done yet...' Tai smirked as the credits started rolling on the first one.

* * *

_Darkness falls._

'This one isn't as bloody but it is very, very creepy...' Sam explained to the bots after they had managed to calm Sunny down.

'Oh it is not!' Tai objected, giving Psyche a dog treat. 'It's about the freaking tooth fairy!'

'Yeah with a creepy white face and black robes!'

'Honestly that sounds rather...fearful.' Optimus stated, looking down at the two humans.

'Thank you...but I wasn't saying I was afraid...' Sam defended himself.

'Oh you lie through your face!' Tai suddenly spoke up. 'After you saw this with me, you wouldn't go in the dark for a month...at least not without me going first!'

'That...is irrelevant..' Sam blushed as Bumblebee and Sideswipe and Jazz sniggered lightly. 'I was being cautious.'

'Than why did you send me in first?'

'If anyone could take out the evil tooth fairy, it would be you cuz..'

'You are lucky that Psyche is lying on my foot or I'd tackle you...'

'Can we just start this thing?' Ironhide stated grumpily.

So with that, Sam pressed play. Creepy music started playing followed by some very old pictures.

'Ohh...prologue's rule!' Tai said in a happy tone, leaning against Blurr's leg now eating some M&M's.

_It is said that over 150 years ago in the town of Darkness Falls, Matilda Dickson was adored by all the children._

'Appropriate name for the city...sounds like a great place to live.' Sam murmured to Bumblebee who nodded and whirred with amusement.

_Whenever one of them lost a tooth, they would bring it to her in exchange for a gold coin earning her the name ''The Tooth Fairy. ''_

'I don't care what they say, that is a hard title to earn.' Tai said aloud, earning her a few laughs from everyone.

_But fate was not kind to Matilda. One night, fire tore through her home on Lighthouse Point leaving her face horribly scarred. Matilda's burned flesh was so sensitive to light, she could only go out at night always wearing a porcelain mask so no one could ever look upon her face._

'That isn't too creepy...'

_One day, two children didn't come home. The townspeople blamed Matilda. They hanged her tearing off her mask, exposing her hideous face to the light._

'Typical human behavior...act before thinking...' Ratchet muttered to Optimus. That earned him a Twinkie being thrown at his head.

'We heard that!' Sam and Tai called at the same time.

_And with her dying breath Matilda laid a curse upon Darkness Falls._

'Duh.' Tai rolled her eyes jokingly.

_The next morning, the two children were found, safe and sound._

'I can hear a chorus of 'Well...shit..' echoing around the city.' Sam said to Tai, which caused her to burst out laughing.

_The town buried their secret along with Matilda's body._

_Since then, there are some who believe that Matilda visits the children of Darkness Falls on the night they lose their last tooth seeking her vengeance on any who lay their eyes upon her face fulfilling her curse:_

'Well that seems a little extreme.' Optimus stated. 'Taking her vengeance on helpless younglings.'

'Hey! If someone hung me without any good reason, I'd be pissed too..' Tai said with complete seriousness.

_''What I took before in kindness_

_I will take forever in revenge. '_'

The next few moments weren't too horrible; besides a close up of a kid pulling his tooth out, than two little ten year olds kissing, and than one of those silent scenes where it is very quiet which pretty much meant something was going to pop up.

'Uhh...Hello movie...whenever you're ready...' Tai spoke up.

'Come on Sunny...you got to watch..' Sideswipe was trying to pry his brother's hands away from his optics.

'I'm not going too and you can't make me!' He whimpered, swatting at Sides hands while keeping his optic's closed.

Ironhide, getting annoyed with the yellow twin, reached over and pinched the wires on his neck hard causing him to make a very odd face and noise. Before anyone else could say anything, the quiet scene in the movie vanished as the kid in the movie peeked over the blankets and than there was....

'GAHH! Primus!!' Everyone jumped as the face of the Tooth fairy appeared suddenly on the large screen.

The exclamation shockingly came from Ironhide, who was now clinging to Ratchet's arm. Ratchet glanced over at him with his optic ridges raised. The weapons specialist than realized what he was doing and quickly straightened himself up.

'Just making sure you weren't getting...you know...afraid...' He mumbled.

'I'm not.' Ratchet did not look pleased.

Tai was laughing. 'I love that!' While everyone...even Optimus himself...were shielding their eyes or optics, she was just watching contently while chugging some mountain dew, absentmindedly stroking Psyche's ears..

'That is what the toothfairy is?!' Sunny squealed later on when he saw another person being snatched up. 'What happened to the sparkly pink dress and the wings?!'

'It's a freaking movie Sunny...Primus's giant panty hose.' She rolled her eyes with another laugh and turned back to the screen.

'And o' course the lights go out...' Jazz laughed a while later. 'It's like a rule or somethin'!'

'Like the funny, black guy always seems to get killed first?' Tai smirked up at her botfriend, poking his large foot.

'Yeah, yeah...' He muttered with a good natured glare in her direction.

The rest of movie passed with many yelps, jumps, yelling at the screen (that was mostly Ironhide), and a popcorn fight started by Sam, they were finally reaching the end.  
'Coolest line in the movie! Right here!' Tai exclaimed excitedly.

'_I see you, bitch!'_ Than the evil Tooth fairy burst into flames, hundreds of baby teeth falling onto the floor.

'Is it over?' Sunny whimpered.

'Ironhide...let go of my hand!' Ratchet yelled.

Tai yawned widely, that movie wasn't very exciting to her in any way. 'Well that was...alright, I guess...'  
Everyone stared at her with raised brows/ridges. 'What?!' She asked in confusion.

'That was...completely and utterly creepy!' Sunny shrieked, looking at her like she was insane.

'What ever you say.' She shrugged, standing up so she could stretch her legs. 'Whiner...' She muttered, causing the yellow mech to glare at her.

'Hey Tai, I say we call it a night.' Sam said taking notice of all the Autobots uneasiness. 'I don't think these guys can take much more...'

'Good idea!' Sunny than got up and took off running to his and Sides quarters, turning on almost every light in the base as he ran.

'God he's a giant pussy!' Sam exclaimed in shock. Tai started laughing. 'Tai, if you say giant vagina I will throw something at you!' That earned him the finger.

'Easy you two.' Optimus sighed. Primus, those two were almost as bad as the twins. He had a feeling that niether he or his team mates would be getting much recharge for a while.

Slag.

* * *

God!  
This turned out to be a novel!

But goddamn it was fun to write! xD

Sorry I just couldn't write nightmare before Christmas! But I will later!

I wanted to get started on other chapters.! I hope you all enjoyed this!

If anyone has any ideas...any at all...review and you will get credit!

Simple!

Thank you Inspire165 for this hilarious idea!

Review!


	2. Chapter 2

This is officially too much fun!

I love one-shots!  
Thanks again to my good friend Inspire for this awesome and hilarious idea!

Onward!

* * *

**Chapter 2**

* * *

'Pump it up!' Tai exclaimed, running into the Autobot's workout room. She had managed to convince Sam to go to the gym with her earlier that morning, much to the amusement of Bumblebee and Blurr. Tai was still full of energy as she bolted about like a hummingbird while Sam could barely walk without gasping. 'Pump it! Pump it! Pump it!' She continued, punching the air before doing a flying karate kid like kick.

'Hey guys!' She than started laughing at what she saw. The twins seemed to be bench pressing over on the far side of the room, Ratchet was weight lifting, as was Optimus, and by the sounds of explosions and the shaking of the walls, Ironhide was in his shooting range. 'What are you dudes up too?'

'What does it look like?!' Sunny snapped, struggling to lift up the huge weight that was made out of some sort of pipe with two Volkswagen beetles on either end.

'It looks like your hurting yourself.' Tai replied with her usual smart ass attitude. 'But that's nothing new...someone's got to do it, and Ironhide is busy!'

With a grin, she wandered over to where Optimus and the Hatchet were. She grabbed a pair of human sized ten pounders and started lifting them, copying their moves.  
'I had no idea you guys worked out!' She laughed.

Optimus chuckled. 'But of course, like humans we have to build up our strength...but unlike humans, it does not take as long.'

'Huh.' She nodded in understanding. Something caught her eye on the other side of the room, and what she saw caught her off guard.

There was her Jazzman, balancing on a huge storm drain pipe while holding a smaller one above his head. 'Hey babe!' He called, almost falling off as he gave her a quick wave.

Waltzing over to him with her pierced eyebrow raised, she crossed her arms over her toned stomach and leaned to the side. 'Question...' She started. 'What in the fragtonic universe are you doing?'

'Ratchet is making me practice my stealth and posture...' He grunted as he continued fighting to keep his balance.

'How's it working for ya?' She asked.

Before he could answer, he fell off the pipe with a yelp and landed in front of her with a crash. 'Not good..' He whimpered out as he sat up, rubbing his head.

She nodded sympathetically and patted his clawed hand. With a grin, she climbed onto Jazz's shoulders and onto the large pipe.

'Tatyana!' Ratchet exclaimed, nearly dropping his own weights onto the unsuspecting Optimus's foot. 'What are you doing?'

'Improving my stealth and posture!' She teased as she stood up with a laugh. Ratchet glared.

'Tai-dye, it takes practice before you can even come close to...' Jazz never got to finish his sentence because at that moment, Tai did something pretty impressive. With fluid like movements, she was now balancing on her hands as she slowly made her way down the long pipe. 'Nevermind...' He grumbled, muttering something that sounded like, 'Show off.'

'I heard that!' She laughed as she than stretched her legs to her front and straightened herself up. She noticed everyone staring at her. 'One of the families I stayed with were gymnasts.' She shrugged, jumping down onto the floor. 'This place is the Bomb!' She exclaimed excitedly. The sounds of pained gasps reached her ears, causing her to glance at the door.

'Oh the triumphant return!' She laughed as Sam limped in slowly. Optimus and everyone turned to see Sam, who looked like he was in pain.

'Hello Sam.' Optimus greeted with a smile. 'Are you alright?'

'Never...better...' He grunted out as he lifted one of his legs in an effort to walk better. Tai couldn't help but laugh at her cousin's pain. She didn't feel much pity, she told him not to push himself too much when he was just starting out. 'Well Sam...I really hate to say I told you so...but...' She than pointed at him and laughed a loud, over exaggerated laugh.

'If I wasn't in pain...you'd so get it...' Sam tried to run to her, but ended up clutching his left hamstring in agony.

'I told you not to lift eighty pounds when you're just starting!' She laughed, leaning against Jazz's leg to support herself. 'Start out small' I said but Nooo...'I'm a man, I gotta do eighty...' She deepened her voice. 'Moron!'

'Oh shut up!' He sat down slowly, before laying flat on his back. 'I want to go home and whimper.'

Bumblebee kneeled next to him, poking him carefully. 'Urrghh...' Sam groaned pitifully.

'Maybe you should take him home.' Ratchet said in concern. 'He looks like he is in pain.'

'Bee...' Sam whimpered, giving a puppy face and holding his arms up. 'Carry me.'

Bumblebee raised an optic ridge and with a shrug, gently scooped up the whimpering Witwicky.  
'I'll see you at home, you big wimp...' She called to the two retreating forms. A middle finer appeared from over Bumblebee's hand. 'Aw you still love me!' She called out.

The bots had all gone back to what they were doing by the time Tai turned back around. She than decided to have some fun with them for a while. She whipped out her phone and texted Blurr, who she had made stay at home to have a rest.

_Staying at base for a while. Don't worry, I will call later._

She placed it back in her bag and watched them all work out for a couple of minutes, especially Jazz.

Not wanting to be left out, she skipped joyfully over to Ratchet and tapped his leg. 'Hey Docbot...down here!'

Ratchet looked down at Tai with a look of confusion. 'What?'

She waved her hand, beckoning him closer. 'Mind if I join?' Ratchet gave another look of confusion before placing down his barbells and lifting her up by her outstretched hand.

'What is it you would like to do?'

'Help you!' She laughed as he placed her next to the huge barbells. She than climbed up onto them and held on as he lifted them up. 'You call that lifting!?!' She yelled, getting everyone's attention. 'I've seen old ladies lift better than you!'

Every mech in the room couldn't believe she was talking, no screaming, at Ratchet that way. Apparently neither could he, his optics turned a dangerous dark blue as he glared.

'Excuse me, young lady...' He said slowly. 'What do you think you are doing?'

'Motivating you!' She chimed in with a grin. 'Is it working?' She than cleared her throat and once again started yelling at the top of her lungs. 'You notice how clean the floor is? That is because you SUCK!!! Lift! Lift! Lift! Feel the burn! Come on you big wimp!'

It seemed to work, because Ratchet started doing more lifts than his previous time, being careful not to fling Tai off as he did. Her laughter echoed around the work out room as she went up and down over and over again.

'Whoa...this is fun! This is fun!' She shrieked with glee when she was lifted high up again. 'Hi Pops!' She called to Optimus as she waved. He started in alarm and quickly rushed over to her.

'Ratchet! Tatyana! What are you doing?' He asked, quickly reaching up to grab Tai from her precarious situation.

'Aww Dad!' Tai whined as she swung her legs. 'I was being careful!'

'Prime, you know I would never intentionally hurt her.' Ratchet tried to explain. Optimus just shot a glare in his direction.

'That's comforting!' Tai called, drumming her hands on Prime's enclosed fingers. 'I'd hate to think of what you do 'accidently'.' She made quotation marks with her fingers. 'Don't throw tools at me!' She laughed, ducking her head down.

'Although her odd motivational help seemed to have improved my numbers...' Ratchet continued, stretching out his large arm.

Tai smirked up at Optimus. 'See? I know what I'm doing...' She shifted her eyes away from the look of 'Yeah, right.' on the leaders face. 'Sort of...' And of course, her 'help' didn't stop there.

The next thing she knew, she was in the shooting range visiting with Ironhide, who of course was blowing stuff up left and right.

She danced right in to some music that was playing in her head, and immediately saw the Weapons specialist cleaning off his cannons.

She bolted over to him and jumped onto his leg. 'Heya Hidey!'

He started and looked down, before grinning slightly. 'Hello, Tai.' He greeted with a nod of his head. He than grumbled as went back to his cannons. Tai quirked an eyebrow at his random mood swing.

'What's up with you?' She asked.

'My aim...well, between you and me...is a bit off...' He muttered, looking embarrassed. 'I don't know what's wrong with me.'

'I seriously doubt anything is wrong with you.' Tai said reassuringly. 'I'm sure you're just having an off day...happens to everyone!' She patted his giant leg.

'I have never had an 'off day' in all my life...' He than sighed. 'I guess I must be losing my touch.'

Tai gasped loudly and dramatically, her hand on her chest. 'Don't ever say that!!' She than thought about it. 'Maybe what you need is a different target...' Ironhide than got a very peculiar look on his faceplates as he stared down at Tai with a growing smirk. Tai blinked and looked up at the weapons specialist. 'Why are you looking at me like that?'

Her blue eyes widened when she saw him power up his cannons. 'Oh! No no no no! I didn't...I didn't mean...Oh shit!' She than took off, screaming.

'HIDE!!!!!'

In her whole life, she had never run so fast as she dodged one small explosion after another. Ironhide wasn't really aiming for her, but apparently she made it easier for him to eat the giant cut outs of Decepticons behind her. Optimus and Jazz, hearing even more explosions than normal from the workout room, poked their heads in to see what the ruckus was about. They carefully approached the large black mech.

'Hello Ironhide.' Optimus greeted. Ironhide grunted back, obviously too busy to say a proper hello. 'What are you doing?'

'Target practice.' The weapons specialist stated simply, taking aim and letting loose another missile from his cannons.

'Uhh..yeah, I can see that...' Jazz than cleared his throat pipes and than asked, 'Have you see Tai?'

'She's the target!' Ironhide said with a very scary smile.

Optimus's and Jazz's optics both widened in horror. 'WHAT?!?' They both shrieked.

And at just the right moment, Tai literally flew in their direction and dove at their feet as another missile went off behind her. 'Holy...Mother!' She shrieked with laughter as she just laid on the ground, panting heavily. 'You jerk off!' She pointed up at Ironhide and than let her arm just fall back to the ground.

'I did not hit you, did I?' Ironhide asked with a hint of worry in his voice.

'Nope!' She continued to laugh, standing up. 'I'm just out of breath...but on the plus side, I made excellent time...and I still have all my appendages!' She jumped up and down excitedly, doing a few punches and kicks.

'And you have improved my shooting.' Ironhide sounded very pleased.

Tai gave a thumbs up. 'Well...glad to have helped...wasn't exactly what I had in mind but...whatevs!'

Optimus than kneeled down so quickly that when Tai turned around, she nearly collided with his ginourmous face. 'Jesus flipping Christ!' She exclaimed.

'Are you sure you are alright? Everything functioning correctly?' The towering commander asked.

'Gee...lemme check...' Craning her neck to look behind her, she did a complete turn before facing Optimus again. 'Yep...everything present and accounted for!'

Optimus nodded in relief and than went to give Ironhide a stern warning as to why humans should not be moving targets, no matter if they volunteer or not.

'I don' think I've ever seen 'Hide so happy...' Jazz muttered, leaning casually against the wall with Tai on his shoulder.

'Well any chance to shoot something that's running; he'll just go for it...' Tai laughed, giving Jazz a friendly flick on the side of his head.

Jazz chuckled as he tried to avoid more flicking and than an idea hit him.

'Hey, you up for driving the older guys nuts?'

'Is the sky blue?'

* * *

After fetching a huge stereo from Jazz's room, and a whole crap ton of downloaded music, they headed back into the workout room.

Everyone was busy doing their own thing so it was perfect for the two of them to plug in the music player, and Tai squatted down to look through Jazz's humongous collection of CD's.

'Hmm...Flo rida, DMX, Black eyed peas...God, do you have anything in here besides rap?'

'In the back!' Jazz called, working on the stereo.

She squealed in delight when she came across a section that was marked: 'Tai's music.' It consisted of techno, rock, Indie rock, Classic rock, hard rock, Celtic music, and some Pop.

'Lets' see...Ahh, here we go...' She picked out a CD and placed it in the player. 'Ready?'

'Plug your ears.' Jazz warned, holding up two extension cords. Tai immediately stuffed her fingers in her ears with a grin.

Jazz than plugged in the music and the sound wave was so intense that Tai flew onto her back with a high pitched yelp. 'Arg! My audio receptors!' Optimus yelled out in pain as he hands held the sides of his head. 'What is that noise?'

'It's Elvis Presley!' Tai yelled at the top of her lungs. 'The king of Rock and Roll!' She and Jazz started dancing along to the music, becoming completely oblivious to everyone else.

Even though the music was way too loud and it was killing everyone else's hearing, they couldn't help but find Tai's dancing impressive. She seemed to dance like a professional, doing what the bots found out from surfing the internet, a dance called the twist.

Jazz was trying to copy the moves and of course, he learned it quickly as he slid his feet from side to side easily.

'Ridiculous...' Sunny muttered. 'Right Sides?' He turned to look at his red twin and started when he noticed he wasn't there. 'Sides?'

'Sorry Sunny...' The red twin laughed, his own foot tapping. 'This is my song...' He grinned, dancing over to Tai and Jazz.

Sunny groaned and slapped his hand over his optics in embarrassment. Ironhide poked his head in at the music and rolled his optics in annoyance at the loud noise. Will always played loud music whenever they had to go somewhere, one of these days, he swore to take the radio out of him.

'Turn it down!' Ratchet yelled, his hands covering his audio receptors as well. 'Turn it down!'

'What!?' Tai, Jazz, and Sideswipe all yelled.

The next they knew, their fun was cut off abruptly when a missile hit the stereo, incinerating it into little pieces.

'What the hell?!' Jazz yelled out in anger, picking up the busted woofers. 'Hide!'

After recovering from the initial shock, Tai just started giggling. 'Oh well...it was fun while it lasted.' She patted Jazz's leg comfortingly. 'No worries, I'll get you a new stereo...'

* * *

Okay!

Inspire I am going to do another chapter with aeribics and a fitness contest!

I just really wanted to get this done!

I hope you all like this because this chapter gave me all kinds of hell!

Hahahaha!

Review!

Ideas...tell me!


	3. Chapter 3

Here we are at Chapter three of the one shots!

This one is for Fantasyaddict, we both agreed Tai had to do this!  
Dairy Queen has the best commercials!

XD

Onward!

* * *

**Chapter 3  
**

* * *

The Autobots thought they had learned all they could learn about humans. Their behavior, their facial expressions, their bodily functions, their appetites, everything...but apparently, they missed one thing.

It was a warm summer day, and Sam, Mikaela, Lennox, Epps, Maggie, and Glen were gathered at the huge Autobot base for a little get together and to escape the searing heat. Optimus was pleased to have everyone there, but there was someone very important to him that was missing.

Tai was late, of course.

When he asked where she was, Sam simply replied. 'She is getting her usual frozen dairy product.'

After looking up what hat meant, he discovered she was getting a food called Ice cream. 'Oh yes, I see...'

A few minutes later, Tai skated in on her skateboard with Blurr right behind her. While balancing on her board, she was eating a light green colored ice cream with cookie chunks in it.  
'What up?' She greeted through a mouthful of ice cream as she skated under Jazz's legs.

'What's that you got?' Epps asked in interest.

'A Girl Scout cookie Thin mint Blizzard.' Tai gushed, taking another big bite. 'Best thing in the universe.'

'That looks absolutely revolting!' Ratchet exclaimed in shock. 'Do you have any idea what that is made of?'

'Nope nor do I care...' Tai grinned back, sticking her tongue back that had chunks of cookie on it. Ratchet made a face of disgust.

'I must insist that I throw that way.' Ratchet reached down but before he could, Tai hissed at him and swiped at his fingers. 'You try to take my blizzard away, you're gonna lose a finger...'

Ratchet recoiled and looked at Blurr, who than shrugged and simply said. 'Shehassharpteeth...'

Tai laughed as she rolled over to Sam and Mikaela. 'Sorry I'm late...'

Sam than opened his mouth, clearly indicating he wanted a bit of her blizzard. With a roll of her eyes, she fed him a spoonful. 'Tank yoo...' Sam said through the mouthful of ice cream.

'No problem!' She said, offering some to Mikaela, who shook her head with a smile, stating she wasn't the biggest fan of thin mints. Tai than rolled over to Optimus and did an ollie before grabbing her board, and hugging his leg.  
'Hey Dad!'

'Hello sweetheart.' He greeted, reaching down and gently patting her head with his large finger.

'Well, I'm starving...' Glen said, standing up. Maggie rolled her eyes. 'Glen, you're always starving...'

'Am not!' He stuttered indignantly.

'Come help me with the barbeque than!' Lennox laughed, getting up himself, straightening his swim trunks.

Before anyone could say anything, there was a knock at the human sized door. Everyone, human and Autobot, stopped in their tracks and stared at the door.

'Who could that be?' Optimus asked in confusion.

'I don't know...' Ironhide replied, powering up his cannons and aiming it at the door. 'Can I take them out?'

'Stop it!' Optimus snapped impatiently.

'Oh for Gods sake!' Sam groaned. 'I'll get it!'

'Sam, be careful...' Bee warned. Sam shushed all the bots sharply, and answered the door.

Standing on the other side was a small little girl wearing the all too familiar Girl scout uniform, her hair in pigtails. 'Good afternoon sir, would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?'

Mikaela and Tai looked up at the sound of the little girl's voice. 'Wow!' Mikaela exclaimed. 'How do they do that? Do they have microchips or something?'

'So that's what they put in the cookies!' Maggie laughed.

Tai, however, was doing a major brainstorm. She looked down at her nearly done blizzard, all the cookie chunks were gone and yet she had a lot more ice cream. 'Umm...Blurr...' She said in an odd voice. Blurr knelt down in curiosity. 'Yes?' He asked tentatively. 'Could you hold this?' She asked, handing him her Blizzard.

Blurr took it in between his fingers carefully. 'Tai,Ihatetoask,butwhatareyoudoing?'

Tai held up her pointer finger, and than without warning, bolted towards Sam.

'Uhh..No, not toda...' He was cut off when he heard Tai's converse coming toward him. He looked up and screamed when he saw Tai running at him and screaming out a single sentence.

'GET THE THIN MINTS!!!!!!!' She than tackled him onto the floor, landing on top of him. Sam groaned when all the air was knocked out of him and just laid on the floor in pain and shock.

'One box of thin mints please...' He whimpered out to the confused child.

Blurr hung his head and tried to hide his laughter. Tai and her thin mints...

'And that, gentlemen, is why you never come between a girl and her mint flavored, chocolate covered cookie.' Lennox explained, laughing at the moaning Sam.

All of the Autobots, even Ratchet, agreed.

* * *

This may be the shortest one yet!

But god damn, it was funny!

Review!


	4. Chapter 4

Here we are with more Tai and Autobot hilariousity!!

This came to me after watching reaction videos on Youtube!  
Hahaha and my own experience!!

Hell to the yes!! XD

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Chapter 5

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'Ohh my god!!!' The voices of Tai and Sam echoed loudly around the Autobot base. Optimus looked up from his stack of Datapads in confusion. What were those two humans up to now?

The sounds of gagging and than the sound of a feminine laugh reached his receptors. Well that didn't sound good...Concerned, he bolted into the recreational room to find Sam bent over a waist basket of some kind while Tai was sitting on the edge of the large table with her laptop in her lap, laughing hysterically at Sam.  
'Man...that was a lot of vomit!' She gasped out between laughter, leaning over slightly, her arms around her stomach.

'You...' Sam gasped out, wiping his mouth on his sleeve. 'are..a..sick...bitch...' But the grin on his face gave away that he was joking. Winking her bright blue optic, she closed her computer and waved to her dad with a happy smile. 'Heya Dad!' She called out with a laugh as Sam sat next to her and shoved her none to gently. She responded in kind by sticking her finger in her mouth than in his ear, which caused him to jam his ear to his shoulder with a squeal.

'Hello sweetheart...Hello Sam...' He greeted, his tone light with amusement. 'Dare I ask what you two are up too?'

'Oh!' Tai laughed, shoving Sam's head playfully. 'We were just watching some nasty videos on the net...I laughed while Sam puked his guts out!' Sam glared at her.  
Optimus quirked an optic ridge. 'What was in this video?'  
Sam grimaced and hunched forward as the images of 2 girls 1 finger rushed back into his head. 'Trust me Opt, you don't wanna know...' He shuddered violently, making a noise of disgust. Tai glanced at him with her human eyebrow raised. 'You sound like your having a seizure...'

'I am!' He snapped. 'The seizure of trying to get the images of girls puking in each others mouths out of my skull.'

Optimus frowned. 'What?' He asked in confusion.

Both Sam and Tai's eyes widened considerably. 'Nothin'!!!' They both exclaimed and they both rushed away before the confused leader could ask anymore questions.

------------------------

(Fifteen minutes later)

'2 girls 1 finger?' Ratchet asked in confusion. Optimus had managed to gather Ironhide, Ratchet, Jazz (who for once was not with Tai), both Sunstreaker and Sideswipe, and Bumblebee into the rech room for a meeting of some sort. Luckily, both Sam and Tai were in her apartment and from the curses from Sam and the laughter from Tai, they were playing a video game of some sort.

'Yes.' Optimus nodded. 'Tatyana and Sam mentioned it earlier...I'm very curious to what happens in it.'

Ironhide raised an optic ridge. Not wanting to admit he was as well, he just made a gruff noise of agreement.  
Bumblebee and Jazz, who had heard about this video, glanced at one another in worry for their comrades. 'Are they seriously gonna watch it?'

Bumblebee shrugged anxiously in response. Sam had actually shown him some reaction videos for a laugh one time, and of course curiousity got the best of the young scout. He still had nightmares about those two girls.

'So, I think we should watch and learn from the contents of this video...' Optimus finished, sounding very pleased with himself.

At that, Jazz stepped forward. 'Uhh..Optimus, I don' think ya'll should watch it...' But his cry of warning was drowned out by Teletran 1 announcing the results of the research on the video. 'I really...uhhh, nevermind....'

Bumblebee, knowing what was coming, turned off his optics and covered his hearing receptors.  
He had a pretty good idea what would happen, and he did NOT want to witness any of it.

-------------------------

'God mother...darn!' Sam yelled out. Tai had beaten him once again in a game where he swore he was unbeatable. Miles could never beat him...Mikaela could never beat him...not even Lennox or Epps.

But Tai was beating him...horribly...with Zero Suit Samus!!!

'You don't think Dad got 'curious' about the video, do you?' Tai asked as they started up a new game.

Sam laughed. 'Doubt it! He's not that stupid...if anything, I can see the twins looking...or even Ratchet..but not Optimus.'

'Yeah, you're probably right...' Tai chuckled. Just as the match was about to begin, they heard a very catching...yet oddly familair...tune echo into Tai's living room area which caused them both look up with raised eyebrow.

'Sam?' Tai asked in a strained whisper. 'Does that music sound familair?'

They suddenly dropped their Wii-motes in shock.

'SHIT!!' They both yelled and bolted from the room. The sight that greeted them was kinda of funny but horrifying at the same time. On the floor of the rech. room were piles of blue goo of all different sizes, and in front of the computer monitor were the Autobots...all of them...staring at the screen in shock.

Optimus's optics appeared to be shuttering off and on, Ratchet was twitching, Ironhide was dry heaving violently in the corner, the twins looked like they were in absolute shock, while Bumblebee and Jazz looked just fine. Apparently they knew better than to watch internet scat videos recommended by stupid teenage humans...and a cyborg.

Tai recovered from her shock and than started fighting back mad fits of laughter. Sam leant against her as he laughed loudly, gasping loudly. 'Oh my fraggin' god!'

'You two are evil little glitches!' Sunny gasped out, kneeling down and getting in their faces. 'That was horrifying!'

'Hey!' Tai snapped back, smacking him in the noseplate with her ring covered hand. 'We never said for you guys to watch it...that was all you!!' She took a deep breath. 'Well, I hope you all learned a valueable lesson.'

Optimus than stood up and gave Tai a very stern father look.

'Yes...now for your lesson, my daughter...' She eeped and hid behind Sam, her blue optic and eye wide.  
'Clean this up.' He motioned to the piles of unprocessed energon all over the floor before heading back to his office to try and rid his memory circuits of that video.

Tai grumbled. 'Bitter old bot.' She grumbled as she stalked into her apartment to get the hose. 'No sense of humor.'

------------------------

This made me laugh as it popped into my head!  
My friend and I decided to make a reaction video to 2 girls 1 finger....

Please do not watch it if you like soup!

Trust me!

XD bwahahahahaha!!

Review!


	5. Chapter 5

Okay ladies!

This one is for all of you!  
bwahahaha!

Onward!

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Chapter 5

----------

To say Sam was afraid was the understatement of the century...  
He was terrified.

He knew this day was coming, yet he did nothing to prepare himself for it.  
How could he be so stupid?

All he could do was get Bee to take him to the base as fast as he could.

Optimus Prime would protect him...hopefully. Not to mention, he'd get in some guy time. He'd hang with Miles, but unfortunately he was out of town.

Bee skidded to a halt and Sam literally flew out, and much to the Autobot leaders surprise, leapt onto his leg and held on for dear life. 'Hide me!' He yelled out in a high pitched tone. 'They're going to kill me! They're going to dismember me! I don't want to die without my boys!' He then let go of the leaders leg and leapt behind the Bot couch.

'Sam!' Optimus peeked his head over the side in shock. 'What are you talking about?!' He gently picked up the boy, who had his eyes covered with one hand and his groin area covered by the other. 'Who is going to offline you?'

'Tai and Mikaela!' He squealed out, clutching onto the leaders large thumb now. 'They are going to bury me alive and do the salsa on my grave! I'm not exaggerating!'

Optimus blinked.

'Okay, I am! But still, hide me!'

Optimus glanced over at Bumblebee, who looked just as terrified as Sam. Now he was very alarmed. 'Now Sam, what are you talking about?'

Sam rolled his eyes and slapped his hand over his eyes, beckoning Optimus to put him down.  
'Primus's jock strap!' He muttered. 'Do I have to spell it out for all of you?! Bee..help me out!' Bumblebee nodded enthusiastically.

'P!' Both Sam and Bee did what looked liked cheerleading positions, their arms forming a P.

'M!' Than an M shape, which was starting to look quite ridiculous yet humorous.

'S!' They ended with a S shape, which nearly caused Bumblebee to take Ratchet's optic out when his pointed his hand upward.

But that only confused the Autobot's more, the only two who weren't confused to all hell were Bumblebee and Ratchet.

'PMS?' Sunny asked with a confused expression. 'What's that?'

Before Sam could respond, Ratchet interrupted.

'Premenstrual syndrome...it is very common with human females, but the symptoms...' The doc bot shook his head. 'It is hard to believe that women can out live men with all the things they have to go through in life...'

'You've been talking to Sarah Lennox again, haven't you?' Ironhide asked with a gruff tone.

'Maybe.' He replied, shifting his optics back and forth, avoiding the icy gaze from the weapons specialist. 'Anyway, looking at all the Symptoms, I can't say I blame them for getting a little cranky...'

'What are these symptoms exactly? And should we be concerned?' Optimus asked worriedly. 'Is Tatyana very ill?'

'No!' Ratchet sighed. 'But some of the most common ones are mood swings, back aches, head aches, food cravings, crying, bloating, acne, tender breasts...' Sam cringed when Ratcher mentioned that. He didn't know why but he found it creepy to hear a giant robot say 'Tender breasts'. 'Joint or muscle pain...then there's the vaginal bleeding...'

'Alright! Alright! I get it!' Optimus yelled. 'Are you sure that is common? That sounds quite horrendous.'

'Unfortunately, it happens every month for three to five days...' Sam whimpered out. 'And it will keep happening for years to come until they reach an age where that wonderful thing called Menopause kicks in!'

Before anyone could say anything, the sounds of bike engines reached everyone's hearing receptors.  
'Oh gosh!!' Sam yelled out in terror, jumping up onto Bumblebee's leg. 'Bee...time for the operation!'

Bumblebee clicked in confusion, clearing asking _What Operation? _

'Operation Haul ass out of room!' Sam than took off, Bee took the hint and bolted after him.

'They can't honestly be that bad...not Mikaela and Tai...' Optimus didn't know who he was reassuring; his crew or himself.

The two girls walked in, taking off their helmets. Both of them had deep circled under their eyes which indicated that the one symptom 'trouble sleeping' was clearly a true fact.

'Howdy lil' darlin's!' Tai greeted, blowing kisses for all of them. Mikaela just waved, yawning slightly.

'Hello...sweetheart..' Optimus greeted cautiously to his newly adopted daughter. 'How are you...doing today?'

Tai raised an eyebrow at the way he was talking to her. 'Okay...?' She answered, laughing a little. 'I'm fine...'

She felt the familiar tingle of being scanned, she than turned sharply to Ratchet. 'I just said I'm okay, now cut it out!' The medical officer raised an optic ridge at her tone but after looking over his scans, he decided not to push it. Her irritation was steadily growing into the red zone...anymore irritation and a famous raging-mad-Tai would be present. No one wanted that.

'Are you sure you two are alright?' Optimus asked again...rather stupidly on his account.

But instead of the raging-screaming-making Megatron look like a angel-Tai...she actually started crying.

'I came here to see my father and my boyfriend, and all you guys do is question my well-being...!' She wailed, tears streaming down her face. 'I'm fine! It's just PMS! Look it up!' She started to stalk away to the human eating area. She then turned sharply, her eyes now dry but looking incredibly pissed off. 'You all have computers in your heads...use'em!' Than with a loud growling yell, she stalked away, all the while muttering to herself...'Men...Robots, Robots...men...no difference, they're all the same.'

Mikaela shook her head with a grin and turned to the flabbergasted Autobots. She fought back a laugh when she noticed all of their optics were wide, and their jaws were slightly ajar.

'I'd sleep with one optic open tonight, boys.' She said with a mischievous grin. 'Tai can get a little...' She paused, trying to find the right word. 'Cranky.'

She than left the Bots to go join her best friend, who was chowing down on chocolate covered pretzels.

---------

BTW Chocolate covered pretzels are the perfect snack for someone whose Aunt Flo is visiting...

Salty, and sweet, and Chocolately!

Anyway!

Review!


	6. Chapter 6

Hello everyone!

I've been wanting to do this one for a while.  
Who here loves Mythbusters?!

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Chapter 6

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'Tai, I'm not sure about this.'

It was a cold winter day in December, snow covered the ground in a thick white sheet of white, ice covered the roads like an ice skating rink, and that meant both Sam and Tai were stuck at the Autobot base for a few days.

Which was alright.

Optimus had decided that the roads were not safe, not even for a Cybertronian. Especially after Bumblebee had nearly spun out and went off a cliff. That had nearly gave the leader a spark attack. So, he had insisted that the two human teens stay with them until the ice was taken care of by the snow plows. Barricade had arrived from his mission, snow covering half of his exterior. He grumbled as he trailed the white substance into the base and shook himself off, getting snow everywhere.

'Oh come on, Sam...' She laughed, placing the bottles of Diet Coke she had purchased and the packs of mentos down. 'This'll be fun...besides, the bots find human elements and reactions fascinating!'

'But diet coke and mentos?' He asked picking up a tube of mentos and looking it over.

'Oh, come on....don't pretend you haven't thought about trying it!' She smirked as she carefully placed the bottles on the human sized table, which was on top of the Autobot sized table.

Sam than grinned and nodded excitedly. 'Yeah...okay!'

Tai than started to work on the mechanism that would drop the mints into the bottles of diet cola. She made sure the tubes that were attached to the top of the bottles were sealed so none of the carbonation would escape. 'Man Tai, are you the next Kari Byron?'  
Tai scoffed. 'Hah, I wish...all I need is a labcoat and red bikini...but sadly, it's minus 95 degrees out there.'

'Actually Tatyana, it is thirty five degrees Fahrenheit.' Ratchet explained, walking in carrying a few tools. 'And steadily decreasing.'

'Yeah, yeah...smart aft Docbot.' She muttered, going back to building her contraption. Optimus then walked in, tilting his head in fascination at what his daughter was doing.

'That is a very impressive project, sweetheart.' He commented, sitting in one of the chairs. 'What is it?'

'Well, Sam and I are practically obsessed with this show on the Discovery channel called Mythbusters, and this new show called Time warp...they were experimenting with this fun little experiment involving Diet Coke and Mentos. So since, we're going to be here for a couple of days...and the contraption they were using didn't look to difficult to replicate...I'd figure instead of just showing you the show...' She turned to everyone in the room. 'Why not show you first hand?'

Ratchet and Optimus glanced at one another. 'That sounds interesting...should everyone be present?'

'Not nessesery, but it would be more fun...' She muttered, attaching the last tube to a bottle and placing four mentos in each container. 'Lot's of fun.'

------

A few minutes later, all of the other Bots had gathered in the room. Bumblebee, Jazz, and Barricade had front row seats. They didn't know if this was going to be a good thing or a bad thing.

'Hello Gentlemen, I hope you all are ready for a human science lesson.' Sam stated. 'And here is your Professor..Miss Tatyana Topaz Witwicky-Prime.'

Tai than walked out wearing what looked like a white Doctor's coat and pair of fake glasses, while carrying a clipboard and a pen. 'Good evening everyone.'

Optimus shook his head with a chuckle and rested his head on his hand. Sunny and Sides glanced at one another in confusion while Ratchet and Ironhide simply looked bored. The three mechs up front were chuckling in amusement.

'Thank you, my dear assistant.' She smiled. 'Now, Diet Cola and Mentos...how does it work you ask?' She picked up a spare bottle of the soda and a mento. 'How does something so small and delicious become a phenomenal experiment that can cause major Ant infestation? The answer is simple...chemical reaction. It was discovered on Mythbusters that the chemicals; caffeine, potassium benzoate, and aspartame contained in the diet coke and the gelatin and gum Arabic in the mentos all contribute to the 'jet' effect.' She then took a big mouthful of the liquid and popped the mento in her mouth. What happened next shocked the Autobots. Brown foam erupted from the cyborg girls mouth, which formed a puddle at her feet. She simply laughed and spat the mento out and wiped her mouth with her sleeve. 'That is only a small demonstration...now for the real thing.' She headed over to her contraption. 'Sam...care to assist me?'

Sam nodded excitedly, putting on his own white coat.

'Alrighty...ready whenever you are...' He said, standing next to her and holding onto his own pulley string.

'Alright everyone...anyone made out of metal may want to stand back a few meters.' All of the mechs backed up, keeping their optics on the two humans and the contraption.

'3...2...' Both of the teens chanted at the same time. '1.' The effect was instantaneous. The mentos dropped down the tubes and into the soda...which than caused what looked like twelve mini geysers made of brown foamy liquid to shoot up thirty feet into the air.

Optimus's optics widened at the display, as did all of the others. This was amazing...the reaction of the two food products were incredible.

'Fascinating.' Ratchet muttered.

The twins just stayed as far away as possible from the sticky liquid.

The liquid than rained back down on the two teens. Tai closed her optic so it wouldn't get in there. They both laughed and yelled when the liquid reached them, soaking them through completely. 'Oh my god! Oh my god!' Sam laughed, slipping and falling onto his side. Tai's hair was covering her face and her makeup was running down her face, but she was laughing just as hard.

'And that my lil' darling's...is science.' She pushed her wet hair out of her face while high fiving Sam. They both than smirked at each other and turned to all of the mechs.

'Who wants a hug?' They both held out their arms, which were dripping wet with diet coke. Barricade, Bumblebee, and Jazz glanced at each other and then bolted out of the recreational room as fast as they could, with the two teens right behind them.

Optimus shook his head while smirking.

'Hey!' Ratchet called after them. 'Whose going to clean up this slag?' Ironhide and the twins glanced at one another and quietly slipped out of the room which only left Optimus.

'I'll get the hose.' The leader grumbled. Ratchet smirked as he walked away.

Like father, like daughter.

---------

That was fun!

Any other ideas?

Review and tell me!


	7. Chapter 7

Get ready for heartwarming goodness!

This chapter is going to focus on Optimus and Tai...I need a few more chapters with just them...who agrees?

Enjoy everyone!

-------

Chapter 7

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It was just another boring day at the NEST headquarters.

All of the human soldiers were at home with their families, Bumblebee was with Sam and Mikaela in Tranquility, Ironhide was Major William Lennox and his family, and the other Autobots were Primus knows where.

Optimus Prime was one of the few mechs who had remained at Base, considering this was his new home and being the leader, had no choice. But it was alright. He was not alone.

His newly founded daughter, who he thought he lost so many vorns ago and had found she had invaded the body of a four year old girl who was now a techorganic by the name of Tatyana Topaz Prime, had a studio apartment on base. Personality wise, she reminded him strongly of Elita-1...tough, a thirst to prove herself to all of the mechs, and very sarcastic...yet, she was very caring, sweet, and funny.

The sound of wheels caught his audio receptors causing him to look up in curiosity. He smiled when he saw her on her famous skateboard. He couldn't help but chuckle at her attire this day; Her ever-changing hair was now layered in various places and was dark brown, her bright blue eye and her glowing optic was alight with delight as she sped around his feet and around the room. Her clothes consisted of a sea-foam green t-shirt with a faded picture of a large floppy disk on the front, he had to chuckle at that..she was quite the 'computer whiz' ,as Sam put it...and a pair black and white plaid skinny jeans.

'Hey Dad!' She called in her usual excited tone. Psyche, her large Great Dane came bounding in behind her with little Sparrow on her back. Optimus smiled warmly at the sight of his newly adopted 'granddaughter' as she clicked and squeaked with giggles. Psyche trotted around the room like a horse before flopping down the floor. Sparrow simply clicked as she gently poked the dog with a tiny finger and giggled when the large tongue licked the small digit. The little Sparkling then yawned sleepily and cuddled up next to the black and white creature.

'Aww...my two babies!' Tai cooed, flipping off her board and catching it swiftly in her hand. 'Aren't they precious?' She then knelt down by her dog and her adopted daughter, giving them both numerous kisses on both of their heads.

'Hello, my little star.' He said with a smile. Tai chuckled at the little nickname; her Dad had taken on a hobby..'How many pet names can I use to embarrass my daughter?'...Just like her human Dad had when she was small.

Straining her memory, she remembered all of the nicknames Robert Witwicky had called her since she was a baby...Monkey-Moo, Biscuit head, Boo-boo bear, Bubby wubby, Anya Bear, and so many others that were odd to be mentioned in front of a large group of people. Optimus's little pet names were slightly cooler, but she was still embarrassed when he called her that is front of everyone...which he intended to do every now and then just to annoy her...His nicknames consisted of Super Nova, Little Star, Precious Youngling, His little Soldier, Sweetheart, Cerulean (because of her eyes), and so many more names.

She took a deep breath. 'What'cha doing?' She asked, blinking her optic.

'Just work, sweetheart...nothing for you to be concerned about.' He answered warmly, turning back to the Data pad in his large hands.

Tai smiled at how nice and calm he was, even under all of that pressure of being the leader of a whole race of giant alien robots and keeping a world safe who didn't even know they existed . She then walked over to where his foot was and hugged his ankle tightly. He started slightly and looked down, he then smiled and reached down and picked her up carefully and set her on his large desk. 'What was that for?'

'Oh...just because...' She shrugged, her cheeks turning a soft pink color. That was another thing Prime found so fascinating about humans...depending on their mood, their skin could change color from bright red to pale white. 'Thanks for accepting my freakishness...' She pointed to her optic and her small robotic arm. Optimus frowned.

'Freakishness?' He asked. 'I don 't understand...'

'Well...I figured...I'm not human...I'm not one of you guys...' She looked down, picking at her bright yellow polished nails. 'Then what am I?' Before he could answer, she spoke up. 'A freak of nature...'

'That is not true!' Optimus exclaimed in a stern tone. With his large pointer finger, he reached down and brushed her long bangs from her eyes, which he was shocked to see tears forming in them. 'It is true...you are no longer truly human...nor are you truly Cybertronian...'His spark clenched when she cast her beautiful blue eyes downward. 'But none of that matters...it does not matter if you are human or Cybertronian...what matters is who you are...you are Tatyana Topaz Prime...my daughter.' He then gave her a comforting smile. 'And trust me when I say this, you are not a freak of any kind...you are unique.'

Tai wiped at her eyes and smiled. She grabbed his finger in a tight hug, which caused him to laugh. 'Thanks, Dad.' She said, showing her very white teeth.

A few moments of comfortable silence passed, broken only by Sparrow's soft clicking and Psyche's loud snoring. Then Tai spoke up again.

'Question, Pops?'

'Shoot.' He replied.

Tai looked up into the gentle optics of her father before taking a deep breath. 'What did Mom look like?'

Optimus's smile faded slightly. _Oh Primus, I knew this day would come._ He hadn't thought about Elita since her off lining... even after so many vorns, it still hurt very badly to think about her. But he didn't want to leave his daughter hanging. Clearing his throat pipes, he looked down into the bright blue that was his daughters eyes.

'Well, where should I start?' He asked tentatively.

'Well...what was she like?' Tai asked with a bright expression on her pretty face. 'Was she pretty?'

Optimus smiled. 'She was beautiful.' He then had a thought. 'What did your human mother look like?'

Tai scrunched up her face in concentration. 'Hmm...good question...let me think...' She blew out a long stream of air through her lips. 'She had long wavy brown hair...freckles...she was pale...you know, I think I have a picture of her. 'She dug through her bag for her wallet. She always kept her picture in her wallet, folded up. Unfolding it, she handed it to her dad, who took it carefully between his large fingers.

His spark fluttered slightly at the woman in the picture. This woman was beautiful, now he saw where Tatyana inherited her appearance, except for the nose. He remembered Sam telling him that both of them inherited the 'Witwicky curse' from their father; long and narrow noses. Rowan Witwicky's nose was small and slightly wider. Her eyes were quite large, bright, and very expressive...and a deep green color.

'You look just like her, sweetheart.' He chuckled when he saw her blush once again.

'Yeah, my human Dad always used to say that.' She smiled then looked away. 'Two families...both of them, I never got to know my mom..' She then looked up into his face. 'Think Mom would've proud of me...both of them?'

Optimus was somewhat shocked at the level of insecurities his daughter was showing. He once again reached down and gently rubbed her cheek with his large thumb. 'Of course...why wouldn't they be?'

'The way I look...the way I act...the way I turned out...' She rambled on about all of her flaws, which he found to be completely untrue. 'Would they have loved me?'

'What kind of a silly question is that?' Optimus asked in a shocked tone. 'Of course they would've loved you...they both gave up their lives so you could have one.' He then poked her in the side, smiling when he received a giggle. How he loved that sound. 'That sounds like love to me.'

'Touché!' She laughed out, swatting at his finger. 'But back to what I asked before...or close to it...how else am I like Mom?'

'Well, you definitely have her personality.' He chuckled, picking her up in his hand and heading to the giant couch. 'Like you, she thought she always had to prove herself to all of the Mechs.' He spent the next hour telling her everything she wanted to know, how they met, where they met, how beautiful she was, and finally to the time where their sparkling was born...and so on and so forth.

Optimus was so busy talking, he hadn't noticed that Bumblebee had pulled in with Sam.

'Hey Big guy!' Sam called, clutching two bright blue drinks in his hands. 'Hey Mai-Tai!'

'Sammy wammy boy! Bumbles!' Tai exclaimed, running over to them after Optimus had put her down. 'Le Gasp! Blue razberry!' She immediately started guzzling down the deliciously cold liquid, since she became part Cybertronian, she could no longer get brain freeze from eating or drinking too fast. 'You know me so well!'

'Hey, I was about to go get Miles and we were gonna throw water balloons on Lennox and Epps...you wanna come?'

'Hell to the yeah!' She then paused. 'Is Ironhide with them?'

'I'm afraid so.' Optimus chuckled, knowing that would not stop her.

'Suh-sweet!' She cheered happily. 'I'll meet you guys out there in a second!'

'Alrighty...hurry up!' Sam laughed, walking outside with Bumblebee.

She turned to her Dad, who looked very amused. 'Mind watching Sparrow and the Psyche?'

'I wouldn't mind at all.' He chuckled. 'Go..have fun!'

'Thanks Dad!' She said excitedly, blowing him a kiss and bolting out to meet Sam.

Optimus shook his head with a smile. 'Well Elita, we have a pretty amazing child.' He let out a stream of air through his vents.

'Even if she does not yet realize it.'

------

Sorry, it's been like forever!  
But I'm back!

I hope you all like this!

Review!


	8. Chapter 8

Oneshot for the Adventures of Tai!

Hope everyone likes this! It just popped into my head!

I've seen list like stories about why a certain bot likes thier human charge and decided to do one with Barricade and Tai, they are very much fun to write about!

Enjoy!

Onward!

-------

Chapter 8

20 reasons...

-------

10 reasons Barricade likes Tai...

1.) He likes the way she says random things at the most random times.

2.) How she has the ability to be strong even when the world is falling down around her.

3.) The way when she laughs her eyes light up.

4.) How she always smells like Jamba Juice and adidas perfume.

5.) Being able to make even the most hard aft bot like Ironhide or Ratchet smile and forget about the war going on around them.

6.) He likes the fact that she trusts him enough to watch Sparrow while she and Jazz go out.

7.) How when she has nightmares, she comes to him first.

8.) How she confides in him.

9.) How tough she is when it comes to dealing with Mudflap and Skids.

10.) How she has become his little sister, his confidant, his reason for staying on earth...and most importantly, his best friend..

--------

10 reasons why Tai likes Barricade...

1.) He is a badass looking Bot!

2.) He likes the same music as she does...except for The Moldy peaches...

3.) He downloaded Caramelldansen into her Guitar Hero game.

4.) How he doesn't mind when she accidently leaves a Jamba Juice cup or a Starbucks cup in his interior.

5.) He always listens to her, no matter how stupid her problem may seem.

6.) How much he trusts her..

7.) How much he likes playing video games with her, even though he loses.

8.) How he takes his job as her guardian and sees it as a partnership.

9.) How hard he laughs when she tells him something funny that no one else would really get.

10.) He knew from the beginning he would never be able to replace Blurr...and that Tai would always miss him, but he was perfectly okay with that. She didn't need a replacement guardian, she needed something more...

She needed a friend.

And she found him.

Barricade and Tai will be friends until the end of time...and nothing can change that.

--------

Aww mushy friendship goodness!!  
Barricade and Tai are really good friends, not anything else!

She is with Jazz!

I will do one of them next along with Optimus and her!

Review!


	9. Chapter 9

Another one shot!

I have been playing tons of Zelda lately and this totally popped into my head!  
What are the Autobot's thinking when they watch the humans play video games? With a giant screen, there has got to be video games days at NEST!

Enjoy!

xx

Chapter 9

How many levels are there?

xx

Brows knitted together in concentration, Sam clutched the wii-mote tightly in his hand as he made swishing motions, causing the video game character on the screen to swing his sword, killing off some sort of weird hylian monster. 'Take that! And some of this! And some of that!'

He loved visiting NEST headquarters for three reasons.

Reason #1: Bumblebee and the other Autobots were there.

Reason #2: Tai was there, and not to mention her apartment was totally kickass!

But reason #3 was the most important one. The giant Autobot sized Television! It was awesome for watching movies, TV, and of course, playing video games!

The screen was flipping' huge! It was like you were actually in the video game! Tai and Sam would spend hours sitting in front of the huge screen, most likely destroying any living brain cells and not blinking for hours. Tai bragged to Sunny and Sides that she started playing Fallout 3 around three in the afternoon and didn't stop until one in the morning! Apparently, she lost track of time. It happens. Optimus was worried when he saw how red her human eye was.

Right now, Sam was trying in vain to fight off numerous amounts of birds that apparently throw bombs while attacking you with their beak. Also he had to defend some sort of bandwagon at the same time. He remembered Tai saying that this part was the suckiest part in the whole game. It took her three tries to beat it. God, she was right! Sam was getting pissed!  
'Fuck!' Sam swore loudly, watching in anger as the wagon burned down...again. Growling loudly, he decided to take a small break before he broke the controller. Deciding he needed a soda, he headed toward the mess hall area. He smiled when he saw Tai sitting at a table with Barricade and Bumblebee sitting on the floor.

Tai looked up when she felt Sam sit beside her. 'What's up, homie?'

Sam simply groaned and slammed his head on the table. Bumblebee winced in sympathy when he heard Sam let out a loud muffled, 'OWWW!'

Tai felt no sympathy. She simply started laughing hysterically. 'Dude, you moron! What the hell's wrong with you?'

'You malfunctioning or something?' Barricade asked bluntly, raising an optic ridge.

'I'm getting pissed, upset, frustrated..just about every negative emotion is festering in my being.'

'Oh really?' Tai asked in a dry tone. 'And why is that, I may ask?'

Sam simply gave her a look. 'Wait, wait...let me guess...red blood shot eyes...huge bags under said eyes...forehead wrinkles that are formed in a grimace...and not to mention, your hand muscles are really tight, Barricade stop laughing!' She glared over at her guardian, who was laughing so hard his frame was shaking. 'Ya dirty minded fragger, anyway!' She turned back to Sam. 'You've been playing twilight princess haven't you?'

Sam rose his eyebrows. 'How could you tell?'

'I've been through the same thing...refusing to blink in case you miss something important which equals the red eyes...huge bags from lack of sleep due to the awesome addicting game..scowling at how stupidly hard the water temples are...and the hand muscle tightness from clutching the controller so hard you feel like your muscles are gonna snap...' She took a deep sip from her mocha. 'Trust me...been there!'

Barricade and Bumblebee glanced at each other in amazement. Then Barricade made a face that indicated the following statement..'My charge is smarter than your charge!' Bumblebee simply glared and whacked the ex-con upside the head.

'Don't make us separate you two!' Sam scolded, shaking his finger. 'So, Tai...' He made a puppy face and laid his head on her shoulder. 'Please help me beat this part!'

Tai groaned and glanced over at the two scouts. They simply gestured for her to help him in his time of need.

'Okay, fine!' She exclaimed. 'I'll help you! By the way, which part are you on?'

Sam smirked.

x

An hour later:

Optimus Prime sighed as he looked over Tatyana's report, frowning at some of the rules she came up with.

'She had to put down the banana peel incident, didn't she?' He groaned at Prowl who simply nodded with a very tiny smile at the memory.

'You know her, she feels the need to write stuff that embarrasses us.' The second in command stated.

'Yes, but if she didn't, I would be very worried.' The Autobot commander said, shrugging his shoulder panels.

'By the way, what is she up too?' Prowl asked, looking around cautiously. He still remembered the Pimp mobile graffiti painted on his side courtesy of Tai and her antics.

'I believe she is with Sam, Barricade, and Bumblebee in the recreational room.'

'Ah. I see.' Prowl replied. 'We might as well go see what they're up too.'

'Yes, my legs could do with a bit of stretching.' Optimus agreed, getting up and stretching his tall frame.

As the two commanders made their way down the hall, they noticed a large group of 'Bots gathered inside the Rec. room. 'What is going on here?'

'Something stupid, I'm sure.' Prowl muttered.

What was going, however, was not stupid. Well, not in Optimus's opinion anyway. There in front of large screen was Tatyana and Sam, playing another video game of some sort. His daughter appeared to be deep in concentration while Sam looked on anxiously as she played the character on the huge screen. Optimus studied what was going on carefully and found himself sitting down next to Wheeljack and watching in interest.

'Oh, you have got to be kidding me!' Prowl exclaimed. 'Optimus!'

'Sh!' The Leader snapped, not taking his optics of the screen. Prowl grumbled before crossing his arms in annoyance.

'Fuck me!' Tai exclaimed, not seeming to notice that her father was in the room. Either that or she didn't care. 'Stupid, hard Lake Bed Temple! And it's stupid rotating-ness!'

She had long beaten the part Sam was stuck on, but her cousin insisted on her beating the Lake bed temple for him. She said she would if he promised to buy her a Starbucks everyday for two weeks. He reluctantly agreed.

'What is going on?' Optimus asked Sunstreaker. 'What is this she is playing?'

'This is The Legend of Zelda, Twilight Princess.' Sunny whispered, keeping his voice low so he wouldn't distract the Techno-organic. 'She's trying to beat the Lake Bed temple, which is the hardest temple in the game. It's like in the Zelda rulebook, make every water temple a pain in the ass. She's been at it now for an hour.'

Optimus could tell his daughter was getting very stressed out. Her hair was sticking up in various places, her facial expression consisted of a scowl, and she was hunched over. Oh yeah, she was in video game mode.

'Son of a..GRRRR!' Tai growled loudly as she fought the monster that was attacking the character on the screen. 'Why won't you stay down? Oh finally!' Sam then grabbed her by the shirt roughly and pointed at the screen in a panic.

'Tai! Tai! Monster! Monster!'

'I know! Let go of my shirt!' She snapped, swinging the wii-mote, nearly causing it fly out of her hands but thanks to the strap, it didn't.

After successfully beating that creature down, and several others over the course of twenty minutes, she finally found the boss key after an epic battle with some more creatures.

'Oh my god! Finally!' She exclaimed in excitement. 'I found the boss key!'

'Yeah!' Sam sounded just as excited. 'Now find the boss room!'

Tai's face fell and she sighed dejectedly while leaning forward and burying her face in his legs. 'Damn it!'

'Janet..' Barricade mumbled. Tai simply gave him the finger without even looking up.

That only made the neutral bot laugh. 'I enjoy tormenting you, it amuses me.' He drummed his clawed fingers together with a sly smirk in her direction.

'You evil yet hilarious bastard!' Tai laughed, getting back to the game after a few more minutes of deep breathing. After a few minutes of looking through the whole temple, she finally found the boss's lair.

'Okay! Here we go!' She pressed the A button. Everyone watched with bated breath as she made the character enter the room.

Tai searched her memory cores quickly, it had been so long since she fought this boss. After a couple of seconds, she finally remembered. 'Oh yeah! This guy's insanely easy for such a pain in the ass temple!'

'Is he now?' A voice behind everyone caught everyone's attention. It was Prowl.

Tai rose an eyebrow but then continued talking. 'Yea, my theory is, the game makers decided to make th water temple bosses easy because after dealing with the temple, you just want to get the hell out! So then you can go deal with the easier temples and the much harder bosses without wanting to tear your hair out.' She than let out a big stream of breath and turned to the screen. 'Okay! Here we go!'

The next ten to fifteen minutes consisted of the techno-organic swishing the wii-mote, trying in vain to get Sam to shut up, swearing every curse word known to man and Cybertron, and various other amusing things.

'This is it! This is it! It only takes three hits!' Making the character swim over to the huge monster like creature on the screen, she shook the wii-mote one last time before delivering the final blow. When the monster exploded on the screen, Sam and almost every bot in the room let out a cheer for her skills.

'Oh my god!' Sam cheered, getting Tai in a headlock. 'You beat him! You rock! You da femme!'

'You've been hanging with Fantasy?' Tai laughed, rubbing her human eye.

'Yes, yes I have!' Sam said with a big smile. 'Anywho, dude, thank you!'

Tai laughed, punching Sam affectionately on his shoulder. 'You're welcome! Now I'm gonna go play Fallout 3 to relax my nerves! And if you need any more help with this game, please hesitate to ask!' And with that, Tai turned and walked out of the room, attempting to do a little jig.

'Alrighty!' Sam sighed, stretching his limbs. 'Okay, now that that's out of the way, this should be a cinch!'

xx

Two weeks later:

Tai was once again hanging out in the Recreational room, Sparrow sitting on her lap as they both played a game on Tai's DSi. Jazz was sitting next to his sparkmate and his adoptive youngling and was watching them play the pokemon game in interest.

'Mommy! I gots a pikachu!' Sparrow squealed excitedly, clapping her tiny hands while still holding the stylus.

'You did! Good job, sweetheart!' Tai giggled, looking up at Jazz who was laughing as well.

Optimus who was nearby chuckled slightly at Sparrow's excitement. A few seconds later, the human door slammed open with a loud bang that echoed across the room. There was Sam, standing there, looking incredibly frazzled and pissed off.

Tai simply chuckled. 'Uh-oh.' She then turned to Sparrow. 'Sweetheart, stay here with Daddy and keep playing, mommy will be back in a few, okay?' Sparrow simply clicked and jump up onto Jazz's shoulder.

Tai walked over to her pissed off looking cousin. Sure enough, his eyes were red, he had big purple circles, and he just looked pissed off.

'Did I forgot to mention that that game has sixteen temples?'

Sam shook his head with a glare.

'I probably should've siad something, should've I?' She continued.

Sam nodded with the same look. Optimus watched the scene unfold in interest.

'Are you pissed?' She asked another question.

Sam paused for a moment and then gave the so-so sign, still glaring.

'Ah, I see.' She then gave him a odd look. 'Should I start running?'

At that sentence, Sam nodded.

'Tai shrugged. 'Going!' She then bolted out of the room with Sam chasing her, his yells of ,'TAI, I'M GONNA FLIPPING MURDER YOU!', echoing down the hall.

'And in conclusion, when playing this Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess game, always be sure to tell the player how many levels are in it...or else, it will end in disaster.'

Until all are one, Optimus Prime.

xxx

Eeeheehee that was fun to write!

I hope you all like it!  
One shots rock!

Review!


	10. Chapter 10

Animaniacs songs can really give a girl some ideas!  
Especially with giant alien robots and some very bored teenagers!

I love this song!

I own nothing but Tai!

Onward!

xxx

The Bone song

xxx

It was just another day at NEST headquarters. Well, not quite..it was the day every Autobot, even Optimus Prime himself, dreaded.

Check up day.

With Ratchet and Wheeljack.

'Oh dear Primus, we are gonna get maimed.' Sideswipe moaned, hiding his face in his knees as he waited out in the Red. room for his turn.

Tatyana Witwicky/Prime sat nearby on a much smaller couch with Sam, both of them texting Mikeala while playing with the many apps on their new Iphones.

'I doubt you'll get maimed..' She said, without looking up. 'Worst thing that could happen is that Ratch will throw a very blunt object at your acoustic sweet spot...'

'I don't even wanna know where that spot is!' The red twin whined

'You probably are better off not knowing.' Sam put in.

'Sideswipe.' The voice of Wheeljack caught their attention. The red twin whimpered. 'Come on, your turn.'

'I don't wanna.' Sides whined, holding onto the couch like a five year old.

Wheeljack rolled his optics and went behind the couch. 'Come on, Sides...it's just..a simple...check up..GET UP!' He was attempting to push Sides off the couch using any means nessessary, it finally ended when he failed at pushing him off while they were back to back and slid down the back of the bot couch, looking rather annoyed or aggravated.

The two teenagers laughed. 'Sides...you want us to go with you?' Tai asked, smiling a wide smile.

The red twin gave them a look of relief and nodded.

'Can we, 'Jack?' Sam asked.

'I don't see why not. Optimus and Miles are in there.'

'Why?' Tai asked, her pierced eyebrow raised.

'Sunstreaker.' Was the scientist/Doctor's short answer.

xxx

Miles was sitting in the medbay, playing a pokemon game on his DS as Sunstreaker was being examined by Ratchet.

'Would you hold still for a slagging astro second?' Ratchet voice exclaimed, sounding irritated.

'It's cold!' The Yellow twin whined.

Optimus was sitting on a larger chair next to the blonde male, watching him play the game in interest. 'So, what is the point of this game you are playing?' He asked, sounding very interested.

'The point is to catch as many Pokemon as you can, these little monsters right there...' He found it so cool that the leader himself found a simple video game so fascinating.

'I see...I've seen Tatyana and Sparrow play that game numerous times.' Optimus smiled at the thought of his daughter and 'granddaughter.'

'Which game?' Tai's voice caught their attention.

'Pokemon!' Miles cheered.

'Oh sweet, dude!' She laughed. 'To be a master!'

'Pokemon master!' Sam and Miles both responded.

Optimus couldn't help but let out a small chuckle. Humans were a very fascinating species.  
'So, how's it going?'

'Going good.' Miles closed his DS, putting it in sleep mode and leaning back. 'Sunny is a big baby, and Ratchet is this close to bashing him over the head with a wrench.'

'Nothing out of the ordinary, eh?' Tai concluded, sitting cross legged on the seat.

'Pretty much.'

Ratchet let out a sigh a few minutes later. 'Sometimes I really wish the Cybertronian body wasn't the most complex body structure.'

A short bout of laughter made him turn around. 'Then you really havne't looked up anything about the human skeleton have you?' Tai asked, looking at him with a sparkling optic and eye.

'How complex could you be?' Ratchet asked, now turning his full attention to the three teens.

'Well, Ratch...there's the miles of intestines, veins, the thousands of nerves, the brain, and the skeletal system.'

'Really now?'

'Yeah..in fact, I think I have a skeleton in my apartment.' Tai took off, after transforming her feet into a pair of small wheels.

'I really hope she is joking.' Optimus said a few seconds later.

Tai came back in a few seconds later, rolling in a full replica of the human skeleton. 'Gentlemen, meet Benny!'

'Benny?' Sam laughed, walking over to look over the plastic thing.

'See guys, all the bones and stuff...there are thousands of them!'

'Isn't there a song called The Bone Song?' Miles asked.

'Are you suggesting we sing it?' Tai asked with a huge grin.

'Oh god!' Sam groaned, knowing what was coming. 'Animaniacs?'

'Yes, let us hear this..' Optimus said, sounding interested. 'I would like to hear about the skeletal system.'

'You heard them, guys. Hope you all remember the song!' Tai exclaimed, sounding very excited at the thought of singing.

'How could I forget? 'Sam muttered, shaking his head.

Tai searched through her Iphone for the song. 'Found it!'

Optimus, Ratchet, the Lambo twins, and Wheeljack watched as the three teens faced them.

'At least this isn't the bean song..' Sam muttered as the music started. Taking a deep breath, he gathered his wits and opened his mouth.

'_Everybody knows about the ankle bone connected to the Other bones you have inside your leg.'_

Miles them came forward. _'And everybody knows it's true, without the bones inside of you..'_

_'Your body would become a scrambled egg!_' Tai sang out excitedly.

Ratchet and Wheeljack glanced at one another with different expressions. Ratchet just looked slightly confused while Wheeljack looked amused.

Sam kneeled down next to Tai's leg, pointing at her foot. Luckily, she was wearing flip flops.

_'So the toe bones connected to the foot bone._' Tai wiggled her toes as Sam sang.

Miles then kneeled down and pointed to the same foot. _'And the foot bone's connected to the ankle bone.'_

_'And the slide is connected to the TromBONE!' _Tai laughed out loud as she sang loudly.

Optimus was chuckling like mad at his daughters antics. He was enjoying this little song very much. He found entertaining and informative.

_'The structure of the human body's Something quite unique And I'd imagine all the bones and joints Connected to each other In a complex distribution Formed by years of evolution That there still is some confusion As to how it came to be._' Sam grabbed the plastic skeleton hands and spun him around as Miles came forward and grabbed the feet.

_'The foot and toes and ankle Help us walk; we should be thankful They're connected to the lower leg Or else we'd all fall down Right, here's the tibia, the shin bone And the fibula is ingrown To the back of the patella Which is also called the knee_.'

The three teens then started singing together while holding up various limbs off the skeleton.

_'Knee knee knee knee knee knee knee, Knee knee knee knee knee knee knee. Knee knee knee knee knee knee knee, Knee knee knee knee knee._'

Tai then came forward with a big smile on her face.

_'Here we classify bone as the Femur or the thigh bone It's connected to the pelvis And the lower lumbar region Up the sacrum to the vertebrae And doctors all prefer to say The sternum or the thorax When they're talkin' 'bout your ribs_.' She placed her hands in her own ribs as she was singing.

Sunny and Sides completely forgot about their nervousness as they watched the little musical going on in the med bay. Even Ratchet was grinning by now.

Sam held up the fingers. _'The finger bones are numerous._' He then wiggled his own.

Miles pointed to the upper arm area. _'The upper arm's the humerus._'

Tai held up the forearm to the left arm. _'The forearm's got two pieces Called the radius and ulna_.' She pointed to each one of the seperate bones.

_'Then the scapula and clavicle_.' Sam pointed.

_'The maxilla and mandible_.' Miles sang.

_'The nasal and the frontal bone And cranium on top._' She knocked the skeleton on the head before planting a loud kiss on top.

Sam turned to the Autobots, looking like he was having so much fun.

_'The Skeleton is really great_.'

'It helps your body stand up straight.' Miles stood in the middle of the two Witwicky and placed both of his arms around both of their shoulders.

_'Without all your brains and guts would fall out on the floor_.'

The song ended with the three teens bowing.

'Well done!' Optimus exclaimed, looking very impressed. Tai smiled up at her Dad.

'That song was...well, interesting.' Ratchet said, amusement in his voice.

'Thanks...wait until you hear about the human brain...' Tai said, now waltzing with the skeleton.

xxxx

There ya go!

I found this song funny!

Review!


	11. Chapter 11

Another little list!  
I remember doing one for Tai and Barricade...

So now Jazz and Tai!

AWW!

I hope you all like it!

Onward!

* * *

Chapter 11

Ten reasons Part 2

* * *

Ten reasons why Tai loves Jazz.

1.) His voice when he talks to her.

2.) How he comforts her when she has a moment of complete and total despair.

3.) When he kisses her, it feels like fireworks exploding in her processor.

4.) The way he rocks both her and Sparrow to sleep at night.

5.) He accepts her for who she is.

6.) He finds all of her oddities cute.

7.) How he watches Anime with her, even though he doesn't really get into it like she does.

8.) He takes her places whenever she just needs to get away from it all.

9.) She likes all the pet names.

And finally, reason number ten...she found her soulmate...someone to spend the rest of her semi-immortal life with. She never thought she would find someone she cared about so much. Life being a sparkmate wasn't an easy one..

But it was a journey...and an amazing one, at that.

* * *

Ten reasons why Jazz loves Tai.

1.) The way she smiles whenever she sees him.

2.) Watching her do the Hare Hare Yukai dance whenever she gets the chance.

3.) The way she treats Sparrow and calms her down when she gets a 'boo-boo.'

4.) Her laugh. It was the best sound in the universe to him.

5.) How when she plays video games...she bites her lower lip in concentration.

6.) Her skateboarding skills.

7.) Her singing voice, and how it sends him to the floor.

8.) The way she smells after she takes a shower...it smells like pomegranates and oranges.

9.) How she gets super excited whenever Wheeljack asks her to help experiment.

And reason number ten, he loves her more then any reason could fathom. She was his sparkmate...his light...his rock...He promised to always be there for her. To comfort her when she gets sad or scared...to love her no matter what happens...

Sure, she was different...but that what he loved most.

She was his..

And he was very thankful.

xxx

Awww...mushy, gooey fluffiness! :D

Enjoy!

Review!


	12. Chapter 12

Thought of this while in the shower!

Had to write it down before my muse went down the drain! XD  
Enjoy!

I own nothing but Tai!

xxx

The Hot Chocolate conundrum.

xxx

Sam Witwicky enjoyed visiting NEST.

Every time he visited, something odd and interesting always seemed to happen. Like on a particularly hot day in July.

xx

Sam climbed out of Bumblebee as they came to a complete stop at NEST headquarters, which was about a two hour drive from his school. Since the weather was so unbearably hot, he just decided to wear his swim trunks and an old wife beater out and about today. After watching Bee transform, Sam and his guardian strolled casually towards the recreational room.

What he saw just about floored him.

There was Tai, shockingly with no other Bot in sight, watching a movie on the giant television screen. It wasn't exactly that that floored him...it the fact that the movie she was watching was _The Polar Express_. A Christmas movie...in the middle of July.

Looking up when she heard Bee's giant footsteps, she perked up when she saw Sam. She was just wearing a skull littered black bikini top and red and yellow flowered pair swim trunks, her slightly longer hair was pulled back into a tiny ponytail.

'What up, skank?' She called from the big bot couch.

'Why are you watching this movie?' Sam asked. He liked The Polar Express very much as well, but when it was the right time of year. 'It's July!'

'I felt like watching it!' She exclaimed, acting as if it was completely normal. 'Come on, watch with me! The best part's coming!' She gave him her famous puppy eye look, the dreaded look that even got Ironhide to take her to get a slurpee when Barricade was out scouting.

Sam thought about it. He really did like the part she was talking about. 'Oh...what the hell?' He shrugged. 'Bee, give me a boost..'

'Aye, captain.' The yellow Bot said back, lifting his charge up. Deciding to watch this movie as well...he had never seen it before...he sat down carefully next to the humans and fixated his optics on the screen, just as the character started to sing.

_'Hot! Hot!_  
_Ooh, we got it!_  
_Hot! Hot!_  
_Hey, we got it!_  
_Hot! Hot!_  
_Say, we got it!_  
_Hot chocolate!'_

'I love this song!' Tai squealed happily, waving her arms in excitement as Sam laughed. Bumblebee twittered in amusement at the little tune. The fact that it had tap dancers waiters and a very eccentric conductor made the song even more enjoyable for the yellow bot.

_'Here, we've only got one rule:_  
_Never ever let it cool!_  
_Keep it cookin in the pot,_  
_You've got-_  
_Hot choc-o-lat!'_

'Man, that looks so yummy!' Sam nodded in agreement as they continued to watch the rest of movie, which wasn't very long but it was that amazing, that the two teens didn't care in the slightest.

'I love it just the same no matter how many times I've seen it!' Tai sighed dreamily.

'That hot chocolate looked so good...' Sam sighed dreamily as well. Tai's eye and optic snapped open as an idea hit her.

'Hey, you want some?' she asked hopefully. She didn't mean to brag, she made a mean hot chocolate.

Sam thought about it. Sure it was over a hundred degrees outside..but, that hot chocoltae offer was so tempting.

'Well Tai, all I have to say is...' He cleared his throat. 'Hell to the yeah!'

Bee quirked his head in confusion and amusement. His human and his cousin were very odd creatures.

**xxx**

Major William Lennox and Master Sergeant Robert Epps were simply dying of heat stroke. Luckily, Ratchet was out when one of them decided to say that out loud.

'Man, it's never been this hot before!' Epps whined, wiping sweat off of his forehead and his bald head.

'I couldn't agree more..' Will panted, wiping sweat from his own forehead. Suddenly, a rather amazing smell caught his attention.

'You smell that?' He asked his long time friend. Epps nodded in agreement, sniffing the air longingly.

'It's smells amazing!' He sighed. 'It smells like...'

Lennox opened the door to the large cafeteria, which was made bigger so the Autobot's could fit inside it, and his eyes widened at what he saw.

There was Sam and Tai, sitting in their bean bags chairs in their swimming gear, drinking what appeared to be..

'Hot chocolate, gents?' Tai held up her large mug with a grin. Sam grinned as well, sporting a chocolate mustache.

'Hot chocolate?' Lennox exclaimed in shock. 'It's the middle of July!'

'So?' The blue optic of the Techo-organic sparkled. 'You know, you want some..' She tautened, wafting the aroma of the hot drink towards the two men.

'It's really, really good!' Sam joined in the taunting.

'It does smell good..' Epps sniffed the hair some more. 'Oh what the hell? I'll have a cup.'

'Make that two.' Lennox finally gave in. He was never one to say no to hot coco. Tai got up, being careful not to spill the hot drink on her.

'Two cups coming up.'

Sam heard a noise out of the door a second later. Getting up, still holding his almost half empty mug of coco, he opened the door and did a double take.

'Hey, Tai...how much coco did you make?' He asked. She thought about it. 'A pot full..why do you ask?'

'Hey, can I have some of that?' A female solder asked.

'Me too!' Another solder exclaimed.

'And me!' Said another voice. Turns out the smell had attracted quite a small mob of soldiers.

Tai's eye and optic widened in amazement. This wasn't what she had intended to happen, but hey...bring on the crowds.

**xxx**

(Two human hours later..)

'Well, what a nice little waste of time.' Prowl sighed out grumpily, driving beside Optimus Prime.

'Now Prowl, you like nature just as much as I do, just admit it.' The leader teased his second in command.

'Yeah, c'mon Prowler...' Jazz drove behind them. 'You gotta admit that the eagle that attacked Red was funny as hell...'

After a moment's hesitation, the police crusier finally nodded. 'Oh alright, that was pretty funny...it's just good to be back at base.'

'No kidding.' Ironhides gruff voice butted into the conversation. As the four bots reached the base doors, they transformed into their robot forms. Stretching out his large frame Optimus Prime opened the doors for his soldiers.

'Thank you, Prime.' Prowl nodded.

'You're welcome.' Prime smiled.

'Now where is my sparkmate?' Jazz asked.

'Probably out causing trouble as usual..' Prowl muttered. Prime glared slightly.

Just then, a group of soldiers walked by, each of them carrying a mug with steam coming out of the top. 'Evening, Bots!' One of them greeted, waving his hand, sporting a mustache on his upper lip.

Optimus gave the group of look of confusion before giving a slight wave. 'What was that they were drinking?'

Prowl cocked his head to the side as he scanned the liquid. 'It appears to be a rather hot beverage.'

'But don't humans usually drink hot beverages in the winter time?' Ironhide asked.

'Yeah..' The voice of Will Lennox caught their attention. 'But sometimes, we make an acceptation.' He raised his mug with a grin before taking a sip. Epps smacked his lips after taking a sip from his own mug. 'Mm...just like Mama used to make!'

Prowl and Optimus glanced at one another.

'Prime, I gotta tell ya...' Glen walked in with a large mug of the hot liquid with a small mountain of some white fluff on top with chocolate sauce drizzled on it in swirls. 'Your daughter is the Goddess of Hot coco!' Optimus couldn't help but grin vry slightly.

Then Tai walked in, with a slumbering Sparrow on her hip.

'Goddess of Hot Coco..?' She thought about the new nickname. 'That's a new one...better then Tai kwon do...or Neck Tai...'

Optimus just grinned at his daughter with a odd sense of pride.

How many fathers can say that their daughter is a Goddess?

**xxx**

Oh plot bunnies! Stop gnawing on my brain stem!

BTW..Story Recommendation!

'Meet the new Girl!' By Anika Chancer! It has Tai and Sparrow in it! Read it! Do it! Now!

Review!


	13. Chapter 13

I had to do this one!

I'm a huge video game nerd so of course Tai will be too!

This one will be much fun!

Onward!

xx

Viva New Vegas!

xx

Optimus Prime looked over the datapad he was holding, a cube of energon in his hand. Prowl was once again coming up with many different rules for his daughter to write down. He didn't think any more could pop up but apparently, he was wrong. Dead wrong.

Looking at one of the human sized clocks, he noticed it was 4:30 in the morning, most of the humans were still sleeping soundly while others, such as Major's, Generals, and etc. were awake and ready to start the day.

But one person who was awake at this hour really caught his attention.

His daughter.

Tatyana Topaz Prime.

She seemed incredibly peppy and cheerful as she scuttled about, wearing a red t-shirt with the television character Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory. He guessed Fantasy got that for her as a gift. Her pants were black and white checker print while her shoes were a bright blue. Her hair was all swept to the side and spiked up.

'Morning!' She greeted happily, sipping at a mocha drink she just purchased.

'Morning, sweetheart.' He said, trying not to sound too surprised. 'May I ask what you are doing up this early?'

'I will be happy to answer that!' She chugged the rest of her coffee and tossed it in the nearby garbage can. 'Something is finally here that I have been waiting for for months!' If this was an anime, Optimus could picture her eyes getting rather large and sparkly, with rainbow effects in the background.

'What would that be?' The Leader asked curiously.

But before she could answer, the sound of screeching tires reached his audio receptors. Bumblebee drove into the base, blaring loud music through his speakers. 'Yo, yo, yiggaty, yo!' Tai called, waving excitedly.

Sam and Miles stepped out, along with Leo, who nearly fell over trying to get out of the backseat. 'Dude, Bee, seriously..' He snapped, causing the yellow Camaro to honk.

'Hey, Tai!' Sam exclaimed. 'Hey, Optimus!'

The Prime nodded in greeting. Now this was strange.

'Ready to go spend a ridculous amount of cash and then burn out our eyeballs from their sockets?' Miles asked. 'Or in your case, short out your optic?'

'You know it!' Tai exclaimed, her messenger bag slung over her shoulder. 'Been waiting for months, and it's finally here!'

'Uhh...wha..' Before Optimus could protest or say anything, Tai hugged his ankle tightly and then got into the backseat with Leo after shoving him over and Bumblebee took off.

Barricade then stumbled into the room, letting out a loud mechanical yawn. 'Oh Tai and her obsession with new video games...' He grabbed a barrel of motor oil. 'She asked me to go, and Jazz to go...no thanks..'

'Just when I think I understand her..' Optimus sighed. A loud crunch reached his audio receptors and he looked down, lifting his foot. He growled in annoyance when he saw the shattered remains of Tatyana's I-phone.

'Tatyana...'

xx

'How long has it been now?' Miles asked, not looking up from his DS.

Tai, who was still searching for her phone, checked her watch. 'Hour and a half.'

Bumblebee looked on in amazement at the long line in front of the video game store. And it seemed only a small percentage of the crowd were female, actually Tai seemed to be the only girl in the long line.

'Hey, what say after this we go clog our ateries at McDonalds?' Sam asked. Tai perked up. 'That sounds awesome, Ratchet's not here..'

'Thank God...' Leo muttered, who was nearly asleep on Tai's shoulder.

'Drool on the shirt and I will go trailer park on your ass.' Tai said in an very unamused tone. But she let him be, knowing it was pointless to threaten Leo Spitz. A loud ding caught the four teens attention.

'Finally.' Bumblebee muttered to himself, using Donkey's voice from Shrek.

xx

It was around ten in he morning by the time the four teens returned to base with their games. 'Hey Dad!' Tai called, gulping down more of the soft drink she got.

'Hello, sweetheart.' He greeted with a smile, which got even bigger when she hugged his ankle tightly. She always did that whenever she saw him...which was all the time. He didn't complain. 'Did you have fun?'

'Oh of course!' She said with a very bright smile, her small optic glowing a bright sky blue. 'Now to go play it until my optic shorts out and starts smoking!' She then bolted to the game room.

'Hey Tai!' Sam called, running after her, leaving Bumblebee to stand next to his Commander. 'Wait up! I wanna challenge you to Caravan!'

'You got cash?' She poked her head out, looking at him with a 'Really now?' look.

'20 dollars.'

'Deal!'

Leo and Miles sluggishly followed to the two excited Witwicky teens. 'Dude, I really wish I didn't say Wired X tasted like battery acid.' Leo whined, yawning loudly.

'Live and learn...' Miles yawned back in reply.

Optimus and Bumblebee glanced at one another. The yellow mech simply shrugged and yawned loudly.

'Go get some recharge, Bumblebee.' The Prime said in a kind tone. 'You deserve it.'

Bee gave a thumbs up and headed to his quarters.

xx

(7 hours larer.)

'Finally.' Opimus sighed, placing down his lazer pen. Psyche looked up and tilted her head up at the tall robot. Optimus couldn't help but grin slightly at the large dog, something in those droopy eyes just made him feel better. And shockingly, Ratchet. Even Ironhide liked her more then he did Mojo.

'Where is that owner of yours?' He asked, picking the dog up carefully and placing her on the floor.

'Hwey Boss-bot...'ave you seen Tai?' Jazz asked, making the Prime jump slightly.

'Will you please not sneak up on me like that?'

Jazz laughed. 'Sorry...but man, haven't seen her all day.'

That caught Optimus's attention. 'You haven't?'

'Come to think of it, haven't seen Sam or Leo or Miles either...'

'Odd.'

Lennox entered the room, looking like he coul burst out laughing. 'Found them, you gotta come see them.'

The two Cybertronians followed the Major into the game room, where the four teens were found. All of the fast asleep. Sam was flat on his back and snoring rather loudly, Miles and Leo were leaning against one another, both of their mouths wide open as they slept soundly. And there was Tai, curled up on her side in a tight ball, the X-box controller clutched tightly in her hand.

'Man, they've been playing for hours.' Lennox commented, himself being a Fallout fan. After glancing at the available console and the sleeping teens, he glanced up at Optimus and Jazz with a kid like look on his face.

'You guys won't tell Ironhide if I play for a while will you?'

Optimus shook his head with a smile. 'Not a word.'

Tai then made a small noise as she moved in her sleep, her optic flashing slightly, her small robotic arm stretching out. 'Hands off the Charlie's Benny..' She mumbled in her sleep.

Jazz shook his head with a grin. 'Tha's my Tai-dye, plays until she passes out..then she quotes the game while passed out..'

A true gamer.

And for some reason, Optimus felt a sense of pride.

xx

There ya go! Fallout New Vegas is quite an awesome game!

I waited in line for half an hour! It was soo worth it!

Enjoy everyone!


	14. Chapter 14

Very late Father's day story!  
Very fluffy between Optimus and my OC!

I own nothing but Tai!

Onward!

xxxx

I'm gonna watch you shine...

xxxx

It was nearing that time of year again. The day where being a Dad was celebrated around the nation. Barbeques, ball games, and other fun activities. In three weeks, it would be Father's Day.

'Hmmm...what to get the old man?' Sam Witwicky mumbled, scratching his head. He and Tai, who had turned on her holographic skin to cover her robotic parts, were in a local Target store, looking at all the various cards.

Sam was shocked to see Tai in such a good mood. Normally, she would've been incredibly depressed and upset about today. But seeing as how she now has a Dad to celebrate this day with, she seemed happy.

'This one's pretty funny!' Tai piped up, drinking a blue slurpee as she picked one up and held it out to him.

Sam swiped it from her hand and read it over. He laughed after he was done, reaching down to pick up a envelope. 'This will work, thanks Tai!'

'You're welcome!' She grinned, checking out the gigantic cards they sold on a separate shelf. 'Hey, should I get my Dad one?'

'I don't see why not.' Sam said, looking them over with her. 'I'd recommend getting a big one.'

'Well, I was planning on it!' Tai laughed, picking one up and holding it open like a newspaper. 'Nah! Not witty enough!' She picked up another one with a poem that was about three pages. 'Oh god no, this is like homework...too many words...'

Sam shook his head. 'Okay, well, while you do that..I'm gonna go find a gift...and he was very specific when he said..'No freakin' Ties this year, boy!'

'He does have quite a large collection.' Tai said thoughtfully. 'I seriously doubt I could find a tie that big for mine...' She giggled at the visual of her Dad wearing a gigantic tie to one of the many government meetings. Optimus Prime with a tie...wow...

Sam laughed as he walked away. 'Sometimes I wonder what goes on in your processor..' He muttered, making his way to the yard work section.

Truth be told, Tai had no idea what to get her Dad. She remembered when she was a little kid, she made her human Dad numerous amounts of stuff; Ashtrays, little vases, and drew numerous amounts of pictures of them and Blurr.

But what to get for a Dad who happens to be a giant alien robot?

She jumped slightly when she felt her comlink go off. Looking around, she pressed a button behind her holographic ear, which was thankfully hidden by her hair.

'Hello...Tatyana Witwicky's comlink, if this is Wheeljack calling for me to get more crash test dummies for him to test explosions on, then I will hang up right now..'

'Although you gotta admit, the one flying and hitting your Dad in the face was priceless.' The voice of Arcee cackled on the other line.

'Oh, hey Arcee!' Tai laughed. 'What's going on?'

'Oh nothing, just calling to see what my favorite little Techno-Organic is up too.' The femme giggled. 'Ow, Sparrow, sweetie...that's attached!' The sound of Sparrow giggling made Tai's spark/heart flutter. 'Sure, laugh at my pain, little devil youngling...anywho, what'cha up too?'

'Oh, just shopping for Dad...it's Father's Day...so...'

'Father's day?' Arcee asked in confusion. 'What's that?'

Tai thought hard. How could she explain it? 'Hmm...Well, it's a day where people celebrate having a Dad...they usually get him a gift, like a card or something...'

'Ohh I get it now!' Arcee exclaimed happily. Tai couldn't help but grin. Arcee was pretty much her femme best friend, besides Mikeala and Fantasy, she could always talk to her about anything. Moonracer was too spacey, and Chromia...well...yeah...

'Soo...you gettin' anything for Optimus?' She asked slyly.

'Well, I'm looking at cards...it's kind of hard shopping for him when even the biggest card will look like a gift tag in his hand...' Tai sighed, imagining if she was an anime character, a big puff of white air would fly out of her mouth.

'Oh I bet he'd love it, he'd most likely put it on his desk...he's got tons of drawings from Sparrow all over his walls!'

'Oh yeah, my little manga artist..' Tai sighed proudly. 'She's amazing at it!'

'Hmm...maybe since your Dad likes art...maybe you can get him a painting or something.' Arcee suggested.

'All the painting's here are Marilyn Monroe or Audrey Hepburn or random shapes of various things...if I wanna get him a painting, I'd rather get him something that means alot to him...' She thought for a second. 'Oh my god! A idea just hit me!'

'What? What?' Arcee asked impatiently.

'I'll tell you when I get home...Tai, outskie...' Tai switched off her comlink then went off in search of her cousin.

**xxx**

After following Sam and Bee home, saying goodbye, and swiping a Dr. Pepper from the fridge, she headed home to the Autobot base just outside of Tranquility. Thank god they had so many around the nation.

'So, what were you guys doing?' Barricade's gruff voice asked through the radio.

'Father's Day shopping.' Tai said, taking a long sip of her soda, being careful not to drip any.

'Oh...' Barricade had heard of that holiday. He couldn't help but feel rather happy for his charge, who finally had a Dad to celebrate it with. Tai leaned back in the seat, really thinking about her gift idea.

'Hey 'Cade...' She asked a few seconds later. 'Is there any way any of the bots have a picture or something of my Mom?'

'Your mother?' He asked. 'You mean Elita-1?'

'Well, yeah...' She shrugged. 'I need a picture of her for my gift to my Dad...'

'Hmm...I think one of the Femme's might have one...might want to ask them..'

Tai sighed. She had a feeling which femme most likely had a picture. Hopefully, this femme wouldn't threaten her with dismemberment again.

**xxx**

Knock  
Knock  
Knock

'Chromia.'

Knock.  
Knock.  
Knock.

'Chromia.'

Knock.  
Knock.  
Knock.

'Chromia.'

The tall door opened, revealing the aggravated femme. 'What, pest? What, pest? What, pest?'

'I need a favor! It's crucially important!' Tai exclaimed.

'Coming from you, I seriously doubt it...' Chromia was about to wheel away and slam the door in the techorganic's face.

'Wait! It's about my Mom!' She exclaimed. The blue femme stopped in her tracks and turned to her. 'Elita?' Chromia asked, wheeling closer.

'Yeah, I need a picture or a holographic image or something!' Tai exclaimed hurriedly.

'For what?' The motorcycle asked, now curious instead of annoyed.

'I'm making my Dad a gift and I need a picture of Mom for it...' Tai took a deep breath as she saw the blue femme's optics soften slightly.

'Hmm...ya know...I think I have one somewhere...' She wheeled over to a large storage unit and dug through the drawer until she found a datapad.

'Here...this one was taken before she had...' She paused for a second. 'You.' She said dejectedly. Tai took the large tablet in her hands and pressed the screen. A picture then popped up revealing a bright pink femme with a kind look on her faceplates.

Tai's eye and optic widened. This was the first time she ever saw what her Cybertronian mother looked like. Sure, her Dad told her but it didn't really help her get a clear image. She really was beautiful. Her frame was slender, her face was beautiful, and she was smiling happily. Her optics were a bright ice blue...much like hers...and her cranium unit sported two slender horn like things.

'Wow...she's amazing...' Tai gasped out, touching the picture with her small robotic fingers.

'She really was..' Chromia sighed sadly. 'You couldn't find a nicer femme..it was known she was crazy about two things...your father...and you...' Chromia kneeled down in front of Tai. 'When she found out she was having a sparkling...it was the happiest orn of her life...'

Tai smiled. 'Wow...you're being nice to me...'

Chromia shrugged. 'Hey, what can I say...you've finally grown from me...or on me...or whatever it is you humans say.'

'Thanks, Chrome..' Tai smiled and hugged the femme's wheel tightly. That startled the blue motorcycle. She's never been hugged by a human before...well, by a part human before...it felt kind of...sort of...nice. Reaching down with a servo, Chromia patted Tai on her back carefully.

'You're welcome...' She said softly, straightening up a few moments later. 'Tai-dye...'

Tai smiled.

**xxx**

(Three weeks later.)

'Happy Father's day!' Sam exclaimed to his Dad, handing him a box and an envelope.

'Whoa, thanks kiddo!' Ron Witwicky smiled as he opened the box. He gave his son an amused glare when he saw the tie rack.

'It's not a tie!' Sam laughed, sitting down next to his old man. 'Tai picked out the card.'

Ron opened the envelope and chuckled at the picture on the card. It was a picture of Darth Vader, sitting at a kitchen table with a coffee mug that said, 'World's greatest Dad.'

And on the inside said, 'Even Vader needs a holiday.'

'Oh yeah, that is so your cousin.' Ron laughed. 'Why thank you, Son.' He then frowned. 'How's she doing today, by the way?'

'She's actually pretty happy today.' Sam told his Dad, picking up a picture of him and Tai with their Dad's when they were five. That picture was taken on Father's day as well. Man, it felt like it was just yesterday. His mom managed to get her in a cute little blue dress for that day, and of course, she got it covered in

'Does Optimus even know what Father's Day is?' Ron asked in curiosity.

'No, but I'm sure he'll figure it out.' Sam was wondering what on earth Tai got Optimus for today.

He couldn't wait to see it.

**xxx**

Tai finished wrapping her gift, feeling very proud of it. It took her three weeks of six hour drawing sessions to get it done. But she was happy with how it turned out

'I really hope he likes this...' She said to Sparrow, who was drawing yet another manga comic strip. Sparrow looked up and squeaked happily. 'Grampops...' She giggled, pointing to the large gift.

'That's right...it's for Gramps!' Tai giggled. 'Okay, how to move it?'

She settled on Annabelle's wagon that she let Sparrow borrow.

'Okay, here we go..' Tai then started carefully pulling the wagon down the long hallway.

'What'cha got there, babe?' Jazz, who was heading to their quarters to get Sparrow, asked.

'Oh hey baby, just a gift for my Dad.' She grunted as she continued to pull it down the hallway. Jazz quirked his head. 'You need any help?'

She stopped, suddenly feeling very stupid. 'Umm..ya know, yeah!' Jazz chuckled, before picking up the wrapped gift easily.

'What is it?' He asked curiously.

'Something pretty amazing!' Tai sighed happily, stooping down to pick up Sparrow, who was carrying her stuffed Pikachu. 'I really hope he'll like it.'

'I'm sure he will!' Jazz leant down. 'Wanna tell me what it is?'

'You'll just have to see.' Tai kissed Jazz on his metal lips quickly, scurrying towards the door to the Recreational room. She peeked inside, looking around for her Dad. There he was, sitting at the large table, going over various Data pads with a slumbering Psyche at his feet.

She felt her spark beat even faster in her chest. She couldn't believe how nervous she was. This was her Dad...the one mech, besides Jazz and Barricade, that she could talk too. But this was weird for her...she's never given him such an emotional gift. Taking a deep breath, she placed Sparrow next to Jazz and walked into the room. Jazz watched as his mate walked over to her Dad when he felt Sparrow grab his ankle.

'What's up, sweets?' He asked, kneeling down next to his daughter. She held up a colorful drawing and handed it to him happily. He looked it over and felt his own spark flutter. It was a drawing of him and her, singing what appeared to be a Pokemon song. It was pretty amazing that anime couldn't even make him look...well, adorable.

'For you, Daddy!' She cooed happily, her big green optics incredibly bright. 'Happy Daddy's day!' The little white and gray femme giggled when Jazz scooped her up and planted a noisy kiss on her small cheek.

'This is the greatest present I ever gotten!' He laughed, hugging his little daughter to him. This was so going on his and Tai's wall. If he could find room...

Tai slowly approached her Dad, and when she did, she poked him in the ankle. He started and looked won, smiling when he saw who it was.

'Hey Dad!' Tai greeted with a wave, her spark beating faster. Oh the anticipation was killer!

'Hello sweetheart.' He greeted in his usual kind tone.

'Umm...listen, I have something for you...I've worked very hard on it and I really hope you like it...wow, I am nervous...'

Optimus tilted his head in confusion. 'What's the matter?' He lowered his hand for her to climb onto and brought her up to his desk.

'I made you something, it's over there!' She pointed to the large wrapped gift by the door. Jazz and Sparrow had scampered away, which caused her to have a sweat drop moment. Optimus's optic ridges rose as he got up. Picking up the large gift, he stood up and brought it back to his desk.

'What is this?' He asked, surprised.

'Well Dad, you have to open it!' Tai was now excited. But her leg was twitching, which meant she was still incredibly nervous.

With careful fingers, he carefully unwrapped the colorful wrapping paper and revealed what was in it. His spark gave a painful jerk. It was a painting of the one femme who meant more to him than anything else in the universe.

'Oh sweetheart, this is...' He felt himself get choked up slightly but he held it in. 'This is wonderful...'

'Happy Father's day, Dad..' She said, feeling tears form in her optic and her eye, and then they fell down her face and onto her jeans. The happiness was replaced with sadness when she thought of her mom and how they never met. She tried to keep her small sobs quiet but it wasn't working. Optimus glanced over at his daughter, his spark broke at the sight of her crying.

Walking over, he gently scooped her up in his large hand and brought her up to his face.

'It's okay, my little one.' He said softly, holding her to his face. 'Let it all out...'

'I never got to meet her!' She sobbed out. 'Why does it hurt so much?'

'Shhh..I know...' He said in a soothing tone. 'It still hurts me too..'

He held her up in front of his face, and gently wiped the tears from under eyes. 'But you should know, she would've loved you very much...just like I do...'

Tai smiled through her tears, wiping them away with her fingerless gloves. 'I love you too, Dad...' She closed her eye and her optic as she leaned against his face.

This turned out to be the best Father's day for both of them.

Because they had each other.

xxx

This is way, way late because I wanted it to be posted!

This is for my own Dad, who is my best friend! Love ya, Dad!

Review!


	15. Chapter 15

It's been freaking cold lately over here, so this popped into my head!

Just a fun story about the fun o winter!

With a cameo appearance by Fantasy and Maple!

Love you guys!

Enjoy!

xx

Snowballs, Snow angels, and Starbucks

xx

It was quite amazing to say the least at how much the weather changed here on Earth.

Optimus Prime poked his head outside of the doors to find the ground completely covered in a blanket of white. Ah yes, snow. It was about that time of the year again.

Most of the soldiers had gone home, including Major Lennox and Master Sergeant Epps. It was rather quiet around the base.

Save for a certain someone.

Who at the moment was out with her cousin, getting Starbucks.

'Okay, tell me again...' Optimus asked Barricade, who was sitting on the Bot couch. 'Why didn't you go?'

'Because I don't like snow in my treads..or in my gears...' He grumbled, not looking up from the giant TV screen. 'And I hate going slow...Bee is way more patient then I am..'

Speaking of which, both Bots looked up when they heard a honk. The yellow bot drove in, his roof covered in white powder and ice as he pulled into the base. The doors opened and the two teens stepped out, both of them sporting heavy layers of clothing.

'God damn, it's cold!' Tai exclaimed, shivering as she clutched her large mocha. She turned off her disguise, her optic blinking rapidly and her small robotic arm whirring slightly as it tried to warm itself. 'Curse my half humanness...!' She flinched when her optic kept blinking, but with a quick slap to the temple, it set itself right.

'Thanks for the ride, Bee.' Sam patted the roof, then stepped back as the Bot transformed, shaking snow off of himself.

'Whoa, watch it!' Sam moved out of way just in time. Bee clicked in apology.

Tai chuckled before walking over over to her father and her guardian excitedly, like she always did. 'Hiya Dad!' She exclaimed happily, hugging his ankle tightly. Like she always did when she saw him.

'Hello sweetheart.' He said in a happy tone.

'Hey asshole.' She said to Barricade, who simply flipped her off. She flipped him off back, with a smirk.

Optimus felt his optic twitch slightly.

'Like I've said many times, you two are very odd.' Sam commented, taking a long sip from his own coffee. He refused to call it a mocha, that word sounded way too unmanly.

'Well, I wouldn't have it any other way!' She retorted. 'Now where oh where are my sparkmate and daughter?' She wondered aloud.

As if on que, which seemed to happen alot around here, the little white and gray femme bolted into the room, wearing what looked like a kermit the frog hat. Tai wondered where that went.

'Mama! Mama!' Sparrow squealed excitedly. Jazz then walked in, rather stiffly. 'Oh it's cold, my joints are frozen..' He whined.

'Daddy slipped and fall down...' Sparrow giggled to Tai, who was kneeling down so they were optic to eye and optic.

'Did he?' Tai asked, laughter evident in her voice as she spoke.

'I didn't see the ice, okay?' Jazz snapped, sounding embarrassed and annoyed. 'I fell, it was embarrassing! And the twins and Fantasy won't stop laughing!'

'When did you become such a klutz?' Sam asked.

Jazz was quiet for a few seconds, trying to come up with a dignified answer. 'I'm not gonna respond to that.'

'Oh babe, i think it's sweet that you made an ass of yourself in front of your offspring!' Tai chimed in. 'Every Dad does it once in a while...'

'Somehow, I sense that comment is directed at me...' Optimus in a unamused tone.

'Dad, need I bring up the bouncy ball incident?' Tai teased, laughing when her Dad face palmed.

'Why must you bring that up?'

'Because I'm your daughter and that's my job!' She said with a sweet smile. 'And besides, Ironhide still can't look you in the optic..'

'IT WAS AWKWARD!' Ironhide's voice echoed to where they were standing. Both of the Primes started slightly.

'How does he do that?' Both father and daughter exclaimed.

Just as Tai was about to say something else, she felt something cold and wet hit her in the back of the head. 'YAWW! Cold!' She shrieked. After doing a hilarious looking dance, she looked behind her to see who her attacker was.

Maple.

Her very tall, british friend.

'Got ya, shrimp!' She laughed.

'Oh you did not just throw a snowball at me while my back was turned!' Tai exclaimed, mocking anger.

'Oh I just did!' Maple retorted, bending down to make another one.

'OH!' Tai exclaimed once again, flourishing her hands. 'OH! Oh, it's on now girlfriend!' She swayed her head in time with her words as she threw away her empty cup in the trash. She yelped when the snowball hit her in the face.

'WOMAN!'

She bolted after her friend, both of the girls laughing.

Optimus watched them run off with amusement. It was rather nice seeing his daughter act like a carefree teenager. It made him laugh.

'Aren't you going to join them?' He asked Sam.

Shaking his head, Sam threw his cup away and scooped up Sparrow, who was clicking slightly in excaustion. 'Naww, I'm gonna do what I always do on snow days...go into the living room and watch TV until my eyes bleed.' He left the room. The three bots had what Tai called a 'sweat drop' moment before Optimus turned to Bee.

'Make sure his eyes don't bleed.'

He then turned to Barricade.

'Go watch the girls, make sure nothing happens to them.'

Barricade grumbled in annoyance before getting up. 'Fine, was just getting comfortable...' He left the warm Red. Room, grumbling all the way.

Optimus then sat down on the couch and relaxed instantly. Finally, peace at last.

xx

Maple screeched when Tai threw a perfectly aimed snowball at her chest. 'EE! Cold!'

'Got you!' The Techno Organic laughed, her hat all askew.

'YO!' A voice called to them. The two girls looked up to see Fantasy wadding towards them, trying not to sink into the snow. 'Can you believe all this snow! Crazyness!'

'Fantasy!' Tai squealed, bouncing over to her friend and hugging her tightly.

'Tai-dye!' Fantasy squealed back.

'Where are the twins?' Maple asked, walking over to her two friends and leaning her arm on Tai's head, which made the techno organic growl in annoyance.

'Trying to 'tobagan'...Fantasy made quotation marks with her fingers as she pointed behind her. Tai and Maple had a sweat drop moment when they saw Sunny trying to slide down a hill, but he ended up going less then ten feet.

'Well, that didn't work..' Sideswipe muttered, scratching his head.

The three girls giggled at their expense.

Loud, rumbling footsteps came from behind them, which caused them to turn around. There was Barricade, loking annoyed and cold.

'Cade!' Tai exclaimed, her arms wide open. 'My friend!'

'Tai, my techno organic little neck pain!' The black and white bot exclaimed mockingly.

'Oh how I just adore our banter, and our hatred for each other..it's so beautiful!' Tai pretended to cry.

'Yeah, yeah...' He grumbled. He shot a glare at Maple, who had bent down. 'You throw one of those icy projectiles at me, I will shoot you..'

Maple froze, and stood straight up.

'Oh, he'll do it...' Tai said with a smirk. 'He shot Jolt in the aft the other day...'

'He was asking for it..' Barricade growled, shaking his fist.

'He asked you to pass him a datapad...' Tai said with a amused look.

'He was interupting my show...' He growled again.

'What show?' Fantasy asked curiously.

'You don't wanna know..' Tai muttered. An idea suddenly hit her. She bent down slowly, making a perfectly round snowball in her hands while Barricade continued to grumble and growl about Jolt. She took aim and fired.

He stopped grumbling when he felt the snowball hit him in the side of the head.

'Wasn't me!' Maple exclaimed quickly.

'I do not want death!' Fantasy chimed in.

Barricade turned to his charge, who was just grinning mischieviously. 'I could've sworn that I said I would shoot someone if they threw one of those at me...'

'If you would recall, you said that Maple, not to me..' Tai retorted, acting way to calm.

'No, I like shooting at you, you shoot back...' The ex-con charged up his cannon. Tai didn't seemed fazed.

'Don't go there, sister!' The Techno Organic laughed. 'Cade then smirked and bent down, and began scooping up snow in his large clawed servos while his charge was laughing.

'Oh, Tai...' He called, in a frightening sing song voice.

Tai stopped laughing and opened her eyes. All she saw was a huge ball of white flying towards her. She gave a loud screech as she was buried.

'Bazinga..' 'Cade muttered, smirking.

Maple and Fantasy glanced at one another, holding back laughter.

Note to self,

Barricade is the champion of snowball fights.

xx

Bahahahaha! Wrote this at about 1 in the morning!

My muse wasn't letting me sleep!

Anyway!

Review!


	16. Chapter 16

Everyone has a fear!

Mine is Butterflies in real life and the dark!  
Tell me yours if you so wish!

I own nothing!

Onward!

xxx

Phobias...rational or not...you be the judge.

xxx

Everyone had a different sort of fear. Some rational, some very ridiculous. Ratchet had taken up studying different people at N.E.S.T. to see what they were afraid of. He was amazed at what he found.

Sam was afraid of heights. He always had problems being in high places, he even got nose bleeds in his high chair when he was a baby. Bumblebee understood his charges fear, as did Jazz. Both Mechs weren't fond of heights either.

Lennox was afraid of team mascots. It was just something about them, they looked sketchy. Ironhide was shocked his charge was frightened of that of all things. But some fears didn't make sense so he didn't question it.

Tai's fear was surprising. She was deathly afraid of the dark, ever since her human Dad was killed, she always said the first thing she see's when the lights go out is the bright red glow of Soundwave's optics. Optimus had knelt down by her and gently placed his large metal hand on her back. 'Do not fear, my daughter...the dark will not hurt you while I'm around.' Tai then proceeded to hug her Dad's hand tightly, laughing as he lifted her up from the ground, her legs swinging.

Miles hated clowns with a passion. He claimed he had a bad experience at the Circus as a kid and left it at that. Everyone decided to not ask anymore questions. After looking it up on teh Internet, Ratchet found he didn't like the dreaded things much either. How people found them amusing was beyond him.

Leo was terrified of needles. Which was an understanding fear. Pain was never fun. He always freaked out as a kid when he had to get a shot. 'Nothing's worse then exposing your ass to the world and someone shoves a needle in the cheek...nothing worse.'

Everyone had to agree with that one, even a few bots.

As for Epps, well..

'Phobia? Me? HAH! As if!' He had scoffed, making Ratchet raise an optic ridge. 'Real men don't have phobias!' Leo, Sam, and Lennox all raised eyebrows at him. Tai, who was sitting on her Dad's hand, started laughing. 'Dad, observe as Epps makes an absolute ass of himself...this shall be fun!' Optimus chuckled in response.

'Everyone has a phobia, Robert.' Ratchet said in an unamused tone. 'Even Optimus has one.'

'Ratchet.' Optimus hissed through his dentia. 'Please do not bring that up, I wish not to talk about it.'

'No! I wanna hear!' Tai made a muffled noise of shock when her Dad's large pointer finger covered her mouth. Sunstreaker and Sideswipe laughed quietly, them knowing what their boss was scared of.

Ratchet rolled his optics and turned back to the Master Sargeant. 'Now, Epps, everyone has a fear...it's nothing to be ashamed of.'

'I have no fear!' He exclaimed. 'None of them can handle my raging manliness!'

'Oh that reminds me!' Tai exclaimed, leaping down from her father's hand. 'I'm flaming! In the MANLY way!'

She then noticed something crawling up his back. Upon closer inspection, she saw it had eight legs, was quite big, and was hairy as hell.

'Sam.' She muttered, getting her cousin's attention. 'Isn't that Master Chief?'

Sam gave her a questioning look before looking at he too saw the thing crawling slowly up Epp's back. 'How did he get out?'

'I dunno...but let's just watch, I have a feeling something marvelous is going to happen!' She sounded gleeful as she held back laughter.

'You do so have a phobia!' Lennox argued. 'You are lying through your teeth! All you are doing is trying to make yourself look good in front of the Autobots!'

'I can't help it if I'm more of a man than you, Will!' Epps laughed as Will's eye twitched.

'Oh, you so did not just go down that road!' The Major was acting very undignified but he no longer gave a shit.

'Should we stop them?' Optimus asked.

'No.' Ratchet sounded annoyed, the urge to throw something at the two men strong by this point. 'You two are being ridiculous!' Himself and Optimus then joined the argument, which was quite comical.

The spider had reached it's destination and had nestled comfortably on Epp's shoulder, who still had failed to notice. Tai then felt maybe she should say something.

'Epps.' She said.

The two men didn't seem to hear her as they continued to argue.

'Epps!' She tried one again, louder this time.

Still ignored.

She then cupped her hands over her mouth. 'YO! OLD GUYS!'

They all turned to look at her with surprised eyes and optics.

'There's a spider on your shoulder.' The technorganic said in a dead pan tone.

Epps paused, trying to register what she said.

'What?' He asked.

'There's a spider on your shoulder.' She said again, this time with a grin.

Epps felt something tickle his neck, shifting his eyes downward his eyes widened at what he saw. Optimus and Ratchet watched as the man went very pale, his eyes got ven bigger, then the funniest thing they had ever witnessed happened.

He screamed. 'GET IT OFF ME! GET IT OFF ME!' He then ran around, doing what appeared to be a dance of some kind.

'Primus, I thought Sam screamed like a chick!' Sunny laughed, almost crying in mirth as the man continued to panic and freak out. Sam pulled what was known as a 'Tatyana' and threw his shoe at the yellow twin.

Tai decided to come forward. 'Epps! Epps! Calm down! Hold still!'

Of course it wasn't working/ The man continued to freak out as the spider just sat there, looking relaxed.

'Ratch! Optimus! GET IT OFF!' He pleaded with the two Autobots.

'I'm not touching that!' Optimus squawked, backing away as the man came closer.

'Epps! If you panic, it'll increase the chances of being bitten! Freeze!' Epps then froze in a rather comical position, his eyes widening as the spider lifted one of it's legs as if to say, 'What's up, homie?'

'Can someone...' He squeaked out, not moving his lips as he spoke. 'Please...get...it...OFF...'

'Hold still, you big pussy!' Tai laughed, moving forward and reaching for the spider. 'Come here, ya little pest!' She cooed to it, holding out her robotic hand. 'Come on, come on!' Her voice sounded pleasant.

'Sweetheart...I don't think...' Optimus wasn't about to let that filfthy thing touch his daughter but Ratchet stopped him.

'This guy belongs to Miles, he's friendly.' Tai smiled as the spider crawled on her hand, before making it's way to her human hand. She made sure to rotate hands so he wouldn't fall.

Ratchet then smirked and turned to the incredibly embarrassed Master Sargeant. 'No phobias, eh?'

Epps glared at everyone in the room. 'This never leaves this room...ever...ever...EVER!'

He turned and stalked out of the room.

'See?' Tai said, still playing with Master Cheif. 'Even the manliest have fears...' she glanced at Lennox and choke back a snort. 'Mascots..hah...'

'HEY!' He snapped. 'they are eveil things, okay!'

Optimus chuckled.

Luckily know one found out about his phobia of rodents.

And he'd be sure it stayed that way.

xx

This one took me a while because I'm worried I'm lsoing my obsession!

Help me people!

review!


	17. Chapter 17

xx

Chapter 17

Chicken pox and smiling Doc bots.

xx

Tai had always thought of herself as an unusually healthy person. She hardly ever got colds, she'd never had the flu once in her life, she managed to avoid any major outbreak of disease at NEST which was a relief because some of them were pretty nasty, and even as a child, she never had to call in sick.

But today, she didn't feel so hot. She felt uncomfortable, hot, and just plain not good. Her throat was unbelievably sore and scratchy, so much in fact that it hurt to talk and it made her sound like she had been smoking since she was seven. Her human eye was red and bloodshot, while her optic was a dull blue color instead of the bright azure color it usually was.

She couldn't be sick, it was impossible.

"God, I feel like shit." She grumbled to herself as chugged some cold water from her water bottle. Reaching the recreational room, she spotted her Dad, Barricade, various other Autobots, various soldiers, and Sam who was sitting on the human couch with Sparrow and Techno, reading Scott Pilgrim to them.

She really wished Jazz was here, but he was on a scouting mission with Bumblebee.

Sam jumped slightly when he felt the couch dip. Turning his head to his right, he grinned when he saw Tai sitting there but it faltered slightly in worry at the tired look on her face, her flushed cheeks, and the dark circles under her eyes. Err..eye.

"Yo, Tai." He said, getting the attention of the three mechs who were closest. Optimus, Jazz, and Barricade.

"What's up?"

Tai turned her head to him, too tired to even lift it up properly. "Nothing, just feeling a little tired." She tried to sound cheerfull but her tone was underlined by a dull tiredness.

"You sure, cous?" He asked. "You seem a little iffy."

"I'm fine, dude." She laughed, though it was a very half-assed laugh so to speak. "Stop being such a freaking worry wart."

"I am not." He grumbled.

"What is he not doing?" Barricade asked, wandering over to the two teens, curious about the conversation they were having.

"I think something's wrong with Tai!" "I'm totally fine, 'Cade! He's just being a spaz!" "AM NOT!"

The car rolled his optics as the two cousins started arguing, which wasn't anything new. "Shut the hell up, both of you. I'll run a scan on Tai, and settle this. Now hold still for a sec, alright?"

Tai nodded and the odd sensation of being scanned swept over her. 'Cade's scanners ran over the techno organic, inspecting every inch, right down to the very cell membrane.

He was silent for a moment before he found something out of place. "Uh-oh." He said.

That caught the attention of the very concerned Optimus, who promply stepped forward and kneeled in front of his daughter. "What's 'Uh-oh'?"

The ex-con turned to him, his red optics widened slightly. "Prime, she has a fever." He said in a concerned tone. "Her core temperature is over a hundred degrees."

Optimus's optics widened before he gently reached forward and placed his large pointer finger on his daughters forhead. Sure enough, it felt hot to the touch.

Tai sighed softly in contentment when she felt the cool metal of her Dad's finger on her forehead, it was way better then any cold rag.

Before she could say anything else, an odd sensation tickled at her neck, causing her to reach up to scratch at it.

"This doesn't look good." Optimus muttered as Tai grumbled, now scratching at her arm. "I'm picking up traces of a viral infection." A metal finger then stopped her from her continuous scratching, his optics now noticing the small red dots now littering his daughter's human flesh. "Stop scratching, sweetie. You'll irritate it."

"Viral infection?" Tai whimpered out, her small hand clutching onto her dad's large finger. "I never get sick."

"Evidently, you get sick like any other human." Barricade mused. "The infection is a disease known as 'Chicken pox.'

"Chicken pox!" Tai exclaimed in fear. "I thought I already had them."

"Uhh..Tai, I may have an answer for that." Sam spoke up, causing everyone to look at him. "Yeah, my mom said it wasn't actually chicken pox, it was an allergic reaction to wool..." Sam had already had it so he wasn't worried about getting it again.

"Oh that's just peachy.." Tai whimpered out, burying her face in the couch arm in despair.

"But after this, you won't get them again." Barricade assured his charge. "Your immune system and internal repair systems are downloading information on the virus so you can fight it off again and again. But as of right now, you are a contamination threat."

"I'll get the face masks." Sam muttered. "Come on kids, let's get away from your diseased mother." He picked up Techno who squeaked and chirped cheerfully while Sparrow turned back to her Mom.

"Get better soon, Mama." She squeaked out, giving Tai a hug being careful not to irritate the red dots on her skin.

"Don't worry, baby, I will." Tai was careful not to breathe in her daughter's direction as she scampered off after her cousin.

She then turned her feverish gaze to her father and gave him her famous 'Puppy dog eyes.' "Daddy." She whimpered out, holding her arms up. "Carry me."

Optimus smiled slightly, unconditional love for his ailing daughter in his optics. "Of course, my little one." He then gently picked her up, his cold metal hands nice against her slowly burning skin, earning a soft sniffle and a whimper from the sick Techno Organic, but she felt content.

As Optimus carried the girl off, Barricade shook his head in concern for his charge as Breakaway walked in, staring after the departing Prime. "Yo, 'Cade." He greeted.

"Hey, Break." He grumbled back.

"Is Tai alright?" The Jet then asked. "She didn't look like a happy camper!" It was known Breakaway was very fond of Tai, almost to the point where Jazz had to threaten ripping his interfacing equipment out once or twice a week.

"She caught a human virus known as Chicken pox." The Shelby Mustang explained.

"Ew. A virus?" Break asked in alarm. "Aren't those tiny micro-based parasites that infect the DNA of cells to spread itself?"

Barricade raised an optic ridge. "Yeah, that is exactly what they are. I'm shocked you even know that."

"Wait a sec!" Break suddenly exclaimed loudly. "How could Tai get a virus? Shouldn't her Cybertronian half prevent her from getting sick."

Barricade rolled his four optics. ""Virus' infect human cells. Her Cybertronian Energon System can't detect which is the virus, becuase they alter her human cells. Her immune system is enough to fight it off, but it will be a rough week or so for the girl."

"Ah." Break then got nervous as he glanced back at the Ex-Con. "We can't get them can we?"

"You're an idiot."

xx

She hated being in the Med-bay, it was way to bright, it smelled like medicine, and it was way to clean for her liking.  
But unfortunatly, that is where she found herself, now back in her pajamas, on a huge medical berth waiting for Ratchet with her father.

She was absolutely miserable, she felt hot, uncomfortable, and even itchier then before. Which was a complete and totally suckish feeling, especially with the first two problems.

"This really sucks and blows." She whimpered, reaching to scratch a spot on her shoulder. A large metal finger stopped her, causing her to whine like a child.

"Aw, Dad." She whimpered out. "Why?"

Optimus sighed softly, sitting in a large chair beside the berth. "All scratching will do is irritate it, causing it to icth more, sweetie." He said to her, stroking her messy hair carefully.

She then coughed, the motion causing her already sore throat to hurt even more. "Man, this sucks, I hate being sick." She curled up more on her bed.

"I know." Optimus said with sympathy.

"You wouldn't know, you guys can't get human viruses!" Tai said, grinning slightly at her Dad whom smirked slightly.

"True. But I was only trying to sympathise."

Tai managed to giggle slightly but that ended up in a coughing fit that made her throat hurt even more and her skin burn slightly. But she managed a small grin. "Thanks, Daddy."

"My poor girl-" The Prime said before the large door suddenly banged open, causing both father and daughter to jump.

"Hello everyone!" Ratchet called, sounding gleeful, which was frightening. "Ah, there's the sick little Prime spudling!"

"That makes me sound like a menu item!" Tai exclaimed in fright. "And second, why so gleeful? Been throwing wrenches at the twins again?"

"Why yes, yes I have been! But back to business, it appears you have the chicken pox, quite nasty little pests!" He then strode over to his large medical tool box and pulled out a needle that was at least nine feet long with some sort of bubbling concoction.

"I have developed a special medicine for just such occasion. But given the fact I just invented it, it may feel like acid burning your insides but that's price we pay for wanting to get better faster, eh? Arm out, please."

Tai scooted closer to her father, her eye and optic wide in terror. "Um, Dad? You have any more sympathy? Cause I could really use some."

"No, but this is the part where I give you a fatherly kiss and run the heck out of here before he tries something on me!" And with that, he gave her a gentle kiss on her head and bolted out of the room as fast as his legs could carry him.

"Oh FML..." Tai whimpered, her eye and optic closed tightly.

Ratchet then withdrawed the needle.

"Just kidding, my dear one!" Ratchet said with a smile, setting the needle on a nearby counter. "That was just carbonated water, just to scare your father out of here."

Tai felt immense relief as she sank back onto the pillows.

"The best medicine I can offer is bed rest, plenty of liquids, and antibiotics." He then pointed his finger at her. "And no scratching!"

Ratchet promptly pulled out some cups, a bottle of water and some antibiotics, setting them down next to Tai and whipping up a quick healthy drink of the stuff for her, the girl breathing in relief that she wouldn't be impaled.

"I'll repeat myself; If you scrath those itches-" The Hummer said sternly. "Then I really WILL whip up a good drug to stab you with. Now then-"

Quickly retrieving the needle, he stated, while grinning: "I think Ironhide needs a lesson in fear. Oh, and Breakaway as well! and maybe Barricade! Oh, the pranks I'll make with this thing! See you later, Tai. Drink your water slwoly and easily, alright?"

"Yes sir."

"Good girl." Ratchet said, before skipping off, singing: "Ironhide! Time for a jab, you old rustbucket!"

"NO! Get away, you psycho!"

Tai giggled softly to herself, before sipping some of her water. Grimacing at the medicine dissolved in it, she lay back, ingoring the damn itches, and sighed, aiming to get some good shut-eye. Damn this feverish pain in the ass...

xx

Sarah Lennox had arrived a few days later to visit Will and everyone else at Base. She was known as the N.E.S.T., she would cook homemade food for the soldiers, talk to them about their problems, and to babysit Sparrow and Techno, who she adored.

"Hello everyone!" She said in a cheerful, kind voice. Optimus smiled, turning away from Techno and Sparrow, who squealed happily at the sight of the blonde woman.

"Sarah!" Sparrow giggled, running to her and hugging her legs tightly.

"Oof!" Sarah gasped out before kneeling down to hug the little white and gray femme tightly. "Hey, little song bird!" She then smiled as Techno toddled over. "Hey, little guy! You're getting bigger every time I see you!"

Looking around, she noticed someone was missing. "Hey, where's Tai?" She asked. "She's always here to tackle me in a hug."

"Well, I have bad news." Optimus sighed. "Tatyana has caught the virus known as the chicken pox. She is in her room, asleep, under light quarintine until the disease has abated."

"Oh, poor dear. Well, don't worry about me, Optimus." Sarah replied cheerfully. "I had the pox when I was younger, so I'm immune to it now. When she wakes up, I'll pay her a visit. I did after all bring her her favourite treat, which is also a good disease fighter."

"Is it anti-viral chemicals?" Ratchet asked.

"A microscopic anit-viruis weapon system?" Ironhide asked.

"Is it Santa Claus?" Jolt asked.

"Nope." Sarah grinned, reaching into her bag. "When you're sick, your sugar levels tend to go down. A perfect boost, in small doses, is this-"

Everyone gasped in amazmenet as the woman pulled something out of her bag, before realising it was-

"Just a metal can of surgary liquid." Ironhide grunted. "How not fun."

"Not just ANY can of sugary liquid. It's THE can of sugary liquid." Srach grinned. Tai would be feeling better in no time with her to help. "When I was a little girl and I was sick, my mother would bring me my favorite drink and it made me feel better in no time at all. Trust me, I'm a mom, I know these things."

Optimus smiled, trusting this woman. "Alright Sarah, I'll take your word for it."

xx

Tai was fast asleep when Sarah poked her head her in. Tai looked miserable even in her sleep, her cheeks flushed and her breathing congested.

Sneaking in quietly, Sarah walked over to her bed and smoothed the Techno organic's hair back in a motherly fashion, removing the dish rag and rewetting it with cold water before placing it back on the ailing girls forehead. The movement jostled the excausted girl out of her sleep and she opened her human eye while her optic came back online with a blue flash.

"Hey Sunshine!" Sarah greeted with sympathey in her eyes as she sat down on the edge of the bed. "Heard you weren't feeling well."

Tai sat up against her numerous amount of pillows and nodded. "It really sucks, but Dad comes by every ten minutes to see how I'm doing which is awesome. He won't let me scratch though." Tai whined, feeling the nagging sensation in her aching body.

"Well, that's good of him!" Sarah said in a motherly tone, patting Tai's robotic hand soothingly. "He really loves you, Tai. He's a good Dad."

Tai smiled at the thought of her father. "Yeah, he is." She then smiled at the blonde haired woman, who she considered a Mom. "Thanks for coming to see me, by the way."

"No problem, sweetie!" Sarah said in a kind tone. "Oh yes, I almost forgot, I brought something for you!" Reaching into her purse, she pulled out the soda can and handed it to the sick cyborg girl.

Tai's feverish eyes lit up in happiness as she took the can and popped it open. "Thanks!" She then took a dip sip and sighed in relief as the cold liquid soothed her throat and she felt the sugar perk her up.

"Thanks, Sarah!" She said in a happy tone. "I really needed that!"

"I figured that would cheer you up!" Sarah smiled and then gave Tai a motherly kiss on her warm forehead.

Tai smiled.

xx

A week passed and sure enough, Tai was out and about, still sporting a few spots but she was no longer contagious.

"Glad to see you are feeling better, sweetheart." Optimus said with a kind smile as Sparrow drew on his daughter's arm with a marker.

"I feel so much better, Dad." Tai said with a smile as Sparrow finished her handiwork before scampering off to find Jazz and Techno. "And Sparrow enjoys playing connect the Dot's on mommy's arm." She held up her arm and showed off her daughter's latest piece of art. "Look a sail boat!" She then rolled her optic and eye and rolled her sleeve down.

Optimus smiled.

Just another day at N.E.S.T. headquarters.

xx

YAY!

Done finally!

I hope you all enjoyed it!


	18. Chapter 18

Aww, Maple I love you! Don't worry, we'll get through this together!

Curse you writers block!  
But anyway!

I hope you all enjoy this! Wrote it on a whim!  
I won no one but Tai and Psyche and the concept of flying skateboards! I wish...I owe that to Death the Kidd!

Onward!

xx

Tony Hawk, eat your heart out!

xx

"Behold my latest, greatest human invention to date!" Wheeljack exclaimed like a whacky, over excited toddler, which in turn caused both Optimus and Tai to glance at each other with curious, yet extremely cautious, looks before the truck stated:

"Wheeljack, that's a strip of wood."

Prime was right. Laying flat on the table was a thin strip of plywood, sanded and polished neatly, with the Autobot insigna painted in bright white and red on the bottom while the top was some sort of rough black material.

"We are all so proud." Tai said with a giggle.

"Hush, buffoons!" Wheeljack snapped. "This is just no mere piece of wood, but it actually is a highly advanced gravity-defying one-seater transportation of perfect fuel efficiency and speed and stability! In short, not-as-smart-as-me people, it a skateboard with an ass-kicking jet engine stuck on it! Oh and it comes with this nifty parachute!"

Wheeljack held up a parachute, once again, with the Autobot insigna on it.

Tai and Optimus exchanged another glance as the techno organic tucked her now white blonde hair behind her human ear. Wheeljack had made a flying skateboard. For humans. More specially...for her. This was beyond bitching!

"Cool beans! So, does it work?" Tai asked, stepping forward to get a good look at the device.

"I haven't the slightest idea." The scientist shurgged, causing both father and daughter to have a sweat drop moment.

"Of course you don't, what was I thinking?" Tai grumbled.

"I have to test it out first. I have added alll the nessesary equipment to keep it stabalized...in other words, who ever rides won't die in a fiery explosion of death."

"Sounds dangerous." Optimus noted.

"As dangerous as having highly heated axes come out of your arms!" Wheeljack retorted.

Optimus gave him a dry look while Tai laughed slightly. "He's got you there, Dad."

"Oh hush."

"So, Tai, my dear one." Wheeljack sai, gently patting the table. "Would you care to try it out?"

"Umm...Wheeljack..." Optimus started to say in a panic but was stopped by a loud squeal of excitement from his daughter.

"Hell yes I would!" She bounded forward like a hyper active child, which she was now that Optimus thought about it. "Can I daddy? Please, please, please, please, please...!"

"Okay, okay, okay, fine, fine, fine...Tatyana, don't hurt yourself!" He gently placed his large pointer finger over her mouth to shut her up. "Wheeljack, you sure it will be safe?"

"Optimus, I'm insulted!" Wheeljack said in a hurt tone. "Why would I have the daughter of my Commander test something was not 95% safe?"

"95%? What about the other five?"

"She could possibly...explode before she even..takes off but that's very small odds of that happening at all!"

Optimus left optic twitched slightly.

"Well, Dad...a 95 is still an A...so I think the odds will be at my back...and if I do die..what better for a skateboarder to die then exploding on a flying skateboard?" Tai said in a cheerful tone.

"Hmmm..."

"Don't worry, Optimus." Wheeljack soothed his leader, patting his side. "She'll be fine, she has the parachute, all the tests have been done...the only thing that could possibly hurt her is a Dece..."

"Wheeljack." Tai said a sharp tone. "Exnay on Epticonay!"

The science bot quickly back tracked. "But, like I said, it's perfectly safe. I can even get Breakaway to keep an eye on her!"

"I don't need a babysitter!" Tai scoffed just as Lennox, Epps, and Sam walked in with Bumblebee in tow. "Hey guys!"

The three men waved at the excited techno organic. Bumblebee twittered in greeting to his Commander and team mate befgore turning curious optics to the device on the table.

"Hey Tai!" Lennox called. "Optimus, Wheeljack!"

"Hello, Colonel." Optimus greeted with a bow of his head.

"Greetings, humans!" Wheeljack exclaimed excitedly. "You are about to witness something extraordinary!"

"Extraordinary means good right?" Epps asked in a cautious tone. "Last time you said extraordinary the base had to be evacuated due to the smoke."

"Honestly, when is everybody going to let that go?" Wheeljack said in an annoyed tone. "It's good! This time...it probably won't explode"

Optimus's optic twitched yet again.

"Hey, big guy, when did that twitch appear?" Sam asked, pointing.

The look the Autobot commander gave him said it all. "Ah, got'cha."

Wheeljack glared at his Commander. "I feel as if I should be offended by that remark, but can we please proceed with the testing?"

Tai shrugged and picked up the plank. It was light, much like her own skateboard. Putting it down, she stepped onto it. It supported her weight nicely, which was a very good thing, since her robotic side wasjust a wee bit heavier then her human side for obvious reasons. "So, how does it work?"

"Ah, I was hoping you'd ask!" Wheeljack squealed gleefully. "Simply put, your feet magnetise to its surface, so you don't fall off, really, and then, a special transmittor links to your processor, allowing you to direct your actions! Magnetise now, link up, and you're good to go!"

"Alrighty then." She said, and did what he told her to do. Everyone watched as the girl concentrated on trying to get the board to lift off the ground...which she did.

Opening her eyes, she nearly fell off the board. "Holy crap." She was literally floating about five or six feet in the air, bright glowing blue lights lighting up teh floor from the boards bottem half. The excited gasps from the four humans made her grin in pride, knowing this was something only for her use.

"That is bitchin'!" Epps said, rushing forward and bending over to look underneath the board. "Crazy stuff!"

"Dude, Tai, you are so lucky!" Sam said in awe. "Wish my board did that!

Optimus watched his daughter continue to laugh as she levitated, his spark feeling lightened at her joy, it was clear she liked that contraption but he still couldn't help but worry. After all, he was her father after all...

But unfortunatly, the test wasn't complete quite yet.

Sigh.

"Okay, now what?" Tai asked.

"Just tell it what to do, and it will do it." Wheeljack said excitedly, literally bouncing on the heels of his feet.

"Umm...input command...fly?" She shrugged, then froze when the rocket's kicked into life and sent her rocketing off, screaming into the air as the board took off, the girl stuck to it via magnets.

"Maintain control!" Wheeljack called after her, before nudging Prime. " Don't worry, she'll be fine...ah...oh crap, I forgot to give her the parachute..."

Optimus's optic twictched once again. "Someone get Breakaway."

"On it." Lennox said.

xx

Tai continued to scream loudly as she continued to fight for control of the device. "Go LEFT! LEFT! LEFT!" She narrowly avoided colliding into one of the main hangers in the area.

Jazz, who was training with Ironhide and Barricade, looked up at the sound, not quite knowing what it was.  
"What is that?" He asked, straining his optics to see exactly what the small, flying object was. It looked way too small to be a fighter jet...and it was giving off no Decepticn signal.

"Huh. No idea." Barricade commented, trying to focus in on what it was.

"Seems tiny, whatever it is." Ironhide said.

Whatever it was, became apparent when a familair voice yelled, more like screamed out. "BABE! CADE! HIDE! GET DOWN!"

The three mechs all quickly dove onto the tarmac as the technorganic flew over their heads at incredibly fast speed, leaving a trail of smoke.

"What the F-TAI!" Jazz yelled, realising his sparkmate was on yet another Wheeljack special. "Tai! Babygirl, get off of that thing!"

"What can't my life be sane?" Barricade grumbled, his head clanging back onto the tarmac with a groan, his charge once again making him question his sanity.

"Optimus let her fly that thing?" Ironhide asked in a shocked tone.

"Oh god! Please don't kill me now!" Tai screamed, her board going freaking crazy as it drove her through a group of palm trees. "OW! OW! Go up, damn you!"

The board did just that, ascending up into the air to avoid any more trees or face full sof rather sharp leaves. Tai struggled to keep her balance as she maintained control, she also made sure not to look down.

"Okay, breathe Tai...it's not so bad...just pretend your at the park...not nearly a hundred feet up in the air." She muttered to herself as the board finally took a straight path. "Um...turn right..."

It easily turned right on the dime, causing the girl to let out a sigh of relief.

"Awesome!" Tai giggled, her body no longer whirling around. "I think I'm getting the hang of it!"

Deciding to be really brave, Tai zoomed down towards the water and skimmed it lightly, causing it to jet behind her like she was on a jetski. Her eye and optic were wide in amazement as she looked down at the light blue water of the ocean, the water spraying behind her as she continued to fly away from the base. Kneeling down carefully, she reached down and touched the water, causing it ripple, distorting her reflection.

"Wow...this is really cool.." She said in a airy voice. "Alright board, turn around!"

The board obeyed and did a long, wide turn and headed back to the base.

Optimus and Wheeljack continued to search the skies as they kept a sharp optic out for the runaway technorganic. "Wheeljack, where is she?"

Sheepishly rubbing his head, the inventer rubbed the back of his neck. "Heh...hard to say...somewhere?"

"Wheeljack. One of these days, I swear..." Optimus growled, torn between worry for his daughter and anger at Wheeljack's lack of foresight. "I should just stuff you in a cave somewhere!"

"That's harsh, Prime." The Mercedes whined, but the truck ignored him and growled: "Breakaway! Find Tatyana."

The nearby jet shook his head: "No need, Prime."

"Why not?"

"No reason, but if I were you, you may want to move about five yards to the right." Optimus was about to ask why when he heard a distinct noise of something approaching rather quickly. Turning, his optics widened when he saw his daughter zooming right towards them at break neck speed,

"Holy crap! Duck and cover!" Both the Commander and the scientist hit the floor while the humans simply stood there and watched in awe as Tai flew over head, leaving a trail of smoke.

"Sorry Dad!" She called out. "WOOO-HOOOO!"

"Frag!" Optimus cursed, quickly getting back up. "Tatyana Topaz Prime, get back here!"

"Chill, boss bot." Breakaway said, laughing his head off as he helped Wheeljack to his feet. "I'll go make sure she's okay! Primus, this is the best thing I've seen since the humans did the Nightmare before Christmas song!"

With that, he flipped into jet mode and took off after the girl.

Fuming, his turned to Wheeljack, who cringed slightly: "You are cleaning out the human toliets this week.."

Wheeljack sighed.

xx

Tai started soaring up into the sky, her hair whipping in her eyes as she flew staright through a cloud. "Wow..." She breathed out as her eye and optic saw the most amazing sight she had seen in a long time. An endless sea of white fluffy clouds, along with the bright blue sky and the bright yellow sun, shining down onto her face, causing her to shield her eyes.  
Turning around, she smiled when she saw the form of Breakaway following her closely. "Seriously now? Well, then...board, pick up the pace!" And with a mighty burst of energy, the board went even faster, parting the clouds as it went.

"Wow...this girl is fast!" Breakaway chuckled. "But not fast enough!"

With a burst of speed, Breakaway zipped after the girl, observing her wheel around the sky gracefully on her new board. Damn, it was like the girl was born to fly. At least with a skateboard.

The jet wheeled around and flew above Tai, whom looked up to see her own reflection in the jet's canopy.

With a laugh, she called: "Hey, Break! Think you can match this!"

With that, the girl swung her board forward and did an impressive grinding trick against a cloud, causing it to disapate.

Breakaway chuckled, before zooming up after her, the two soaring valiantly through the sky, before the jet took a deep dive, then, at the last minute, streaking back upwards in a stunning display of speed.

Tai whistled approvingly, before grinning as she picked up speed, got nearer to the jet's side and promptly slapped her hand against his wing in an "AERIAL HIGH FIVE, FOR THE WIN!"

Breakaway just laughed as they continued to zoom around.

"Hey! Race ya back!" Tai laughed, going into a dive.

"Whoa! Wait! Tai!" Breakaway exclaimed, chasing after her.

xx

"Optimus, calm down..." Ratchet said, who was gently scratching Psyche on the stomach. "You're wearing a hole in the floor."

Optimus ignored him as he continued to pace and watch the sky for any sign of Breakaway and his precious daughter.

Jazz wasn't doing any btter...it was widely known around base that Breakaway was very fond of Tai, so fond in fact that Jazz threatened to rip off important appendages if he tried anything. But then Tai would throw one of her brightly colored shoes at the jet and Jazz would feel better.

"Send Breakaway after her..." Jazz grumbled, causing Optimus to stop and glare.

"Jazz, are you in anyways, a jet?"

The silver bot didn't comment.

The Soldier on the moniter, known as Britt Anderson, laughed slightly when he overheard the little argument between the two Autobot's. He was the newest recruit to N.E.S.T...and thank God he signed up for this branch, he had never laughed so hard while out in the field.

"Who would've thought working along side giant Alien robots could be so exciting!" He said to Captain Graham, who simply gave him an amused look.

"Cleary, you haven't read Tai's rulebook have you?" He said with a smirk.

Suddenly, Sam let out a yell as he gazed through his binoculars. "Found them!"

Everyone gathered to see the small from of Tai zooming towards the ground at rather high velocity speed.

"Oh, that is not good..." Wheeljack said from behind them. "She's coming in rather fast..."

"That's what she said." Sam muttered, causing Sunny and Sides to snigger lightly.

"Tatyana!" Optimus called in a panic. "You must slow down!"

"DAD!" Tai called back, sounding terrified. "WHEELJACK! HOW DO I STOP THIS THING?"

"Well, crap...knew I forgot to mention something.." He flinched when he saw both Optimus and Jazz starting at him with death in their optics.

Then before anyone could stop her, Tai flew right off her board when she hit a container and she flew off in the distance with a loud crash, causing everyone to flinch.

"Ouch..."

Optimus looked as if he was going to offline at any moment as Jazz called in a panic.

"Ya alright!"

"I think so...hey, did anyone spill ketchup?" She called back.

"Nope." Barricade dead panned.

"I'm not okay!" She exclaimed, causing both Jazz and Optimus to run over.

Sam let out a low whistle. "Wow, she dented a tank with her head...that's even better then when she broke the window with her chin."

xx

Sweet!

I finished it!

Review pwease!


	19. Chapter 19

I blame Maple Alycia Hood for this one!  
And Lilo and Stitch!

I own Tai, Sparrow, and Techno!

Lilo and Stich belong to Disney and Trasnsformers belong to Hasbro!

xx

Kid's say the darndest things...

xx

It was a normal day at N.E.S.T. headquarters in New Jersey and little Sparrow was on a mission. By complete accident and courtesy of Lilo and Stitch, she had discovered a hidden talent her little brother possessed.

She knew her parents really wished she wouldn't try movie stunts on her one year old brother but what they wouldn't know wouldn't hurt them right?

"Come on, Techy!" She whined, trying to get him to stand up. "We need to show mommy and daddy!"

The little charcoal gray sparkling simply continued to chew contently on his teething ring, a gift courtesy of Carly, who had enough of being bitten by 'her little Poppet'. The little white X-box femme huffed as she tried to figure a way to get her little brother to move.

"Ping!" She squealed as she always did when an idea hit her. Grabbing her little red wagon, she dragged it over to where her little brother was sitting "You force me to do this!" She defended herself as she heaved her little brother into the wagon, who simply clicked and squeaked in protest at being moved against his will.

"Hi Sparrow!" A little voice chirped, causing the little X-box femme to jump. Turning, she said her human friend, three year old Annabelle Lennox. "What'cha doing?"

"Moving Techy!" She squeaked, finally getting his little gray form settled next to the record player that belonged to her mother. Hopefully, she won't get in too much trouble for borrowing it without asking first.

"What for?" The little girl asked, quirking her head to the side.

"Something awesome!" Sparrow giggled, her optics glowing an even brighter shade of green.

Annabelle tilted her head slightly in interest as she followed her friend.

It didn't take the two little ones long to find the grown ups and the Autobots, who were all just doing mundane activities in the Recreational room. Sparrow spotted her Mom and Uncle Sam playing Mario Kart, while her Daddy was talking with various Autobot's including her Grandpa, 'Hide, and Ratchey.

Glanicing over at her friend, Sparrow gestured for Annie to follow her as she made her way slowly but surely to where her Mom was. She figured Techno's new talent would get everyone's attention.

"You going down!" Tai exclaimed as she leaned into her turn, which wasn't nessesary but she was mainly doing it to annoy her cousin.

"Come on, Wario! Go faster!" Sam yelled at the screen.

"Mommy." Sparrow said, trying to her mother's attention. When it didn't work, Sparrow reached up and tugged at her mother's baggy sweater sleeve. "Mommy!"

Tai jumped and paused, ignoring Sam's exclaimation of annoyance.

"What's up, buttercup?" Tai smiled at her daughter.

"Look." Sparrow then turned on the battery powered recor player and placed Techno's little claw on the vinyl material. At Tai's confused face, Sparrow held up a finger in a gesture that was saying, "Watch."

She then gently tilted Techno's head back so his mouth was open and then:

"You ain't nothing but a hound dog,  
Crying' all the time."

Tai and Sam's eyes widened slightly and their eyebrows rose at the display. Jazz, Optimus, Ratchet were all watching as well with a series of mixed expressions...amusement, alarm, and confusion.

Sparrow then closed her little brothers mouth and the music stopped, but after a couple of seconds she opened it back up and more music came out.

"You ain't killed a rabbit,  
and you ain't no friend of mine."

She then closed and took Techno's finger off the record disc and the little sparkling simply sat there, his blue visor glowing.

Tai didn't quite know what to say either then a simple: "Um...?"

Jazz watched as his daughter and little Annie dragged the wagon that was carrying his son away into the next room. He then turned to Optimus and Ratchet, with a smug look.

"That's right, ma son." His prideful face then turned a bit worried.

"Is that...normal?"

Ratchet paused, searching for the right answer but Optimus quickly cut in:

"Of course, being your son, it's no doubt he was going to have musical talents. Don't worry, Jazz...Techno is as normal as any of us."

Jazz sighed in relief and followed the youngling's into the next room, no doubt to make sure Sparrow didn't try anything else.

Tai then looked over at her father and the doc bot. "Hey, Dad...is it really normal?"

Optimus gazed at his daughters for a few seconds.

"...Sure..."

Tai smirked. "That's what I thought." She then turned to Sam, who still looked a little surprised.

"Bet you a million bucks your kid can't do that."

Sam glared.

xx

Eh...not my best, but hey...still fighting writers block!

Thank you, Maple...I was giggling at the visual!

Review! 


	20. Chapter 20

Hey!

So, I would to thank Makenna Witwcky for this inspiration!

Thanks, doll!

I decided to do this in Tai's point of view for a fun twist!

I own no one but Tai, Sparrow, Techno, and all that jazz.

No pun intended!

Onward!

xx

The many facts of Tatyana Topaz Witwicky/Prime!

xx

Which is me! Hey everybody! For those of you who don't know me, my name is Tatyana Topaz Witwicky/Prime, but everyone, who is not my father or Prowler pants, calls me Tai.

I know what you all are thinking, what else could you NOT know about me?! After all this time, what else could there be?!

Prepare to be amazed!

Fact #1.) My favorite color is hot pink.

I don't claim to be a girly girl by any means, but that color is badass! I put it in my hair all the time, Jazz thinks I look damn sexy in it, and damn it, it's just a cool color!

Fact #2.) I change the color of my hair twice a month and the color of my Cybertronian arm once a week. This hair color is white blonde with purple, as for the arm, made it out to look my Padre! I look great with flames!

Fact #3.) My favorite Disney Princess is Rapunzel, I have been compared to her on a numerous occasion. Which is ironic because my hair is rather short.

Fact #4.) My cybertronian name is Matrix, after the Matrix of Leadership. Epic, huh?

Fact #5.) I have quite the temper, but it takes a shit ton to royaly piss me off.

Fact #6.) I LOVE fast food!

Fact #7.)I am a Pegasister and proud of it! I spent all day watching My Little Pony with Sparrow and Skystorm! Even Jazz thinks it's funny!

Fact #8.) I am allergic to Cottonwood trees..the little spores SUCK! They always end up flying right up my nose or straight down my throat. Dad, 'Cade, and Jazz take extra precaution when they drive me around. I love them dearly!

Fact #9.) I was in the foster system for ten years.

Fact #10.) 'Cade and I do killer Futurama impressions. His Zoidberg is way to funny!

Fact #11.) I can't function during training without Skrillex music, or caffiene.

Fact #12.) Aunt Jude told me I was actually born with brown eyes, but after my 'accident', they turned into the blue color they are today!

Fact #13:) I love watching scary movies with Jazz, we laugh and do commentary Mystery Science Theater 3000 style.

Fact #14.) I wanted to be a space robot when I grew up. Dreams really do come true!

Well, that's all the crazy facts about me I can think of! Want to know anymore about me, feel free to ask!

Toodles!

xx

Like it? Hate it?

Review!


End file.
